We live in an age when a news story can become the stuff of legend and fodder for balladeers within days. And yes, the story of the wily burglar of Telegraph Hill, who we thought had for sure screwed himself by getting stuck on a cliff and subsequently surrounded by cops, but who managed to slip away into the night just as soon as police packed up their stuff and gave up their stakeout, has already become a ballad by local musicians Taylor Brown and Brian Bergeron. And it's pretty catchy!
The burglar remains at large, and unless he tries to strike again or pawn the ring he allegedly stole at a nearby pawn shop, he's likely to remain at large. Below, the lyrics, if you care to sing along.
The Ballad of the Burglar of Telegraph Hill
Way up on the cliffs of Telegraph Hill
Perched a young man with plenty of time to kill
He may have been seen stealing the ring
From a nearby apartment building
The cops thought for sure we've got him good
No need to climb up there into the woods
Shined the lights up on the trees saying 'can burglar please'
'let us know if there's anything that you need
Well he said 'Turns those lights off I'm trying to sleep"
And anyways you ain't got nothing on me
Well the cops have had enough so they packed up their stuff and let the man on Telegraph Hill be
He came down down down down the Telegraph Hill
The neighborhood had nothing better to do watched him slide
down down down down Telegraph Hill