Get your mind out of the gutter, we're talking about the Colbert Report's recurring Nailed 'Em segment which last night featured self-titled "independent journalist, media activist and web developer" Mark Burdett getting "nailed at a protest march in the anarchy capital of America: San Francisco."

The lawless Burdett faced justice after getting [ahem] nailed with a ticket for jaywalking during a protest on Market Street that turned violent way back in 2005. The crime might not seem so bad, but just wait until the 2:40 mark when Colbert brings in a battle-hardened "5-year veteran of the San Francisco crossing guard squad" who has a few choice words about the real dangers of crossing illegally. Gotcha Media at it's finest.