"We know who you are. You are dead meat," reads the poster at Atlas Cafe. Apparently, someone stole one of their bikes, but THEY'VE GOT YOUR GODDAMN NUMBER. Ooooh, lookout, they're going to you to death or something.

Srsly though, bike-theft is dramatically vile; and if ever there were bicyclists we wouldn't want mad at us, the Cyclecide folks are they. Oh, sure, their fun-fairs and clown getups may look foofy and fey, but don't be fooled: these are folks who can assemble a bike-powered ferris wheel from scratch. RUN, BIKE THIEVES.