You can't make this shit up, folks! Two specially trained sea lions and a dolphin succeeded in "identifying" a suspicious device attached to a concrete pier piling as part of a counter-terrorism exercise the other day near AT&T Park. The marine mammal team also successfully spotted two suspicious divers and used a leg cuff to "apprehend one of them."

We have no idea how this really helps the cause of port terrorism, barring the introduction of an army of these awesome animals, but we're truly sorry we missed the show. It's like Sea World, Macgruber edition!

Gavin, for his part, said the animals "inspired" him, and some Berkeley stick-in-the-mud from the Earth Island Institute whined that animals shouldn't be made to perform such stunts for our pleasure. But they're fighting terrorists! And they're cute! What's the harm? [SF Gate]

Mayor Gavin Newsom sent out his latest exploratory missive about running for Governor for the state of California. Yay.

Newsom starts out declaring, "When I first started talking to friends and family about running for Governor, I was excited at how much enthusiasm there was for the idea." Which? Might not be the truth. That is, if you go by what a few "insiders" claim about Gavin, that he loathes being in politics, this enthusiasm just isn't the case. Then again, who wouldn't be high on the power and attention politics brings? He's in an envious and addictive position. How could he not love it?

Anyway, the best part of this latest burst of exploratoriness, as SF Weekly and SFBG have already noted, is that even his father is meh on the notion of his son running the Golden State. (Perspective time: Newom is still miles better than Arnold or eBAY blondie.) Check it out:

That’s why I was a little taken aback when I asked my father what he thought. Without hesitation the man whose opinion I value most came out and said it:

"Don’t do it Gavin."

I think my father must have seen my face - because he immediately said - "Of course I think you would do a great job - it’s just that nobody is going to be able to solve the state's problems. I don’t want to see you fail in a job that's impossible to do right now.”

This is, almost word for word, the same speech our father gave us when we carelessly tried out for the football team.

Newsom goes on to say, "I hope all of you get a chance to meet my dad. He is the smartest, toughest and most caring person I know."

Gavin, we're open most of next week, name the time and place!

(To read the press release in its entirety, follow the jump.)

Since, naturally, Jews control the media (oh, we kid.) and the Gav loves the media, Mayor Gavin Newsom sent out the following statement yesterday, condemning the defacing of the SF Holocaust Memorial.

MAYOR GAVIN NEWSOM'S STATEMENT ON VANDALISM AT THE SAN FRANCISCO HOLOCAUST MEMORIAL

The Holocaust Memorial is a powerful symbol of the six million victims of the Holocaust. It is a monument that pledges its existence to "the creation of a world in which such evil and such apathy will not be tolerated." [It will, and it has. -- SFist]

This act of hatred and intolerance reminds us of the need to honor that pledge. San Francisco is a city that embraces people of all faiths. We strongly condemn this despicable and cowardly act. [Despicable, yes; cowardly, not so much. We're too scared to perform any act of offense or brutality unless it's behind a computer screen, so this guy creeps us out. What this is NOT is an act of anarchy. Not paying taxes, spinning showtunes at a gay bar, or purging meals are forms of anarchy. We digress.]

I have been informed that the Department of Public Works and Arts Commission staff were able to successfully remove all evidence of the graffiti by midday today. [Any readers have a pic?] In addition, the Arts Commission is in discussions with Captain Corriea of the San Francisco Police Department about what further precautions may be taken over the next several days to prevent this from happening again.

That said, any New Year's Eve Gaza Israel Food Not Bombs Pinko Free Your Mother Goyim protests going on tonight? IndyBay's got nothing.

You remember how the Mayor's office told Yelp that they were going to declare December 4 Yelp Day? But then, when the day arrived, team Newsom blabbed to the media that that wasn't the case, even though they had sent Yelp higher-ups several emails telling them otherwise?

Well, it turns out, according to SFGate, the cancellation all had something to do with Prop 8, the same-sex marriage ban.

Shortly after Californians banned same-sex marriage, Yelpers angry about the outcome started giving bad reviews to businesses whose owners donated to the Yes on 8 side - even if they'd never actually patronized the business. Yelp, whose founders voted against Prop. 8, removed those reviews and said political discussion was welcome elsewhere on the site.

An upset Matthew Goudeau, director of the mayor's Office of Protocol or Whatever, forwarded a terse e-mail exchange he had last month with Jeremy Stoppelman, Yelp's co-founder, to the Gate; the Mayor's office claimed anger over Yelp's removal over anti-Prop 8 reviews; and then some sort of foie gras reference was made. (Read more about it here at SF Gate, who seem to think Yelp Day, or lack thereof, is of the up0tmost importance.)

Oh, Hank. When you deliver, you do it in spades.

Earlier this week, when Newsom held a press conference in Noe Valley to push the actually impressive Shop SF, an incentive plan begging city residents to shop in SF only, CBS 5 reporter Hank Plante asked Newsom why his most visible purchase all year -- his Chevy Tahoe Hybrid SUV -- was bought at a car dealership in Colma.

Newsom gave Plante this Sarah Palin-like retort, "I have no idea. I just candidly -- thanks for the gotcha question -- I don't have a clue."

While this purchase may seem trivial, Ellis-Brooks Chevrolet on Van Ness Avenue is now shutting down its new car business after 69 years due to the failing local economy. "I think it's wrong for any of our city officials to buy anything outside the city," Marie Brooks of Ellis Brooks Autos tells CBS 5.

And the best of this PR mess? Newsom wouldn't get back into his SUV while the CBS 5 camera was rolling. Instead, he just walked around Noe Valley, aimlessly. Aw.

Following on the heels of other YouTube stars such as Chris Crocker and the Chocolate Rain guy, Mayor Gavin Newsom continues to harness the awesome power of the world wide web via a nifty new YouTube page. (New-ish, anyway. It says he joined in October.)

Today's Chronicle manages to muster up an astounding 900-plus word article on it, fellating "the tech-savvy mayor" and his latest way to getting his message out to a wider audience. (That is to say, this is all a part of his attempt to transition too Sacramento.) Not only will his YouTube cinematic masterpieces allow "wonky, long-winded Newsom to leave no detail on the cutting-room floor," but will also allow him to dive deeper into topics like ending homelessness and panhandling, improving the food stamp program, universal health care, turning Market Street medians into urban gardens, creating a local carbon fund, and other critical but zzzz-y stuff.

Newsom, we should point out, also pens for Daily Kos, the Huffington Post, and Salon. Not to be outdone, his wife, Jennifer Siebel, once wrote for SFist as well.

Anyway, you can check out his State of the City Address here. Newsom, Nathan Ballard, and staffers from the city's Department of Telecommunications and Information Services (?!) just finished up these videos at the new Academy of Sciences at 1 a.m. this morning.

But the not so great part of all this is that both the comments and ratings have been disabled. Boo. (You know we'd give your sharp features and momentum a five, Gavin. Bah.)

Things got a wee bit heated at last night's Presidio Trust Public Board of Directors Meeting. The hot topic about was that art museum thingy we most likely never plan on visiting, but sure sounds swell nevertheless. Anyway, according to Jim Herd, who snapped the above shot, Newsom addressed the crowd, and then he was loudly booed when he finished. Tough crowd, tough crowd. (Read more about it here.)

San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom is taking another crack at marriage, this time with a blond: SFist's biggest fan, Jen Siebel. (Here's to hoping this one sticks, guys!) Few details have been released regarding their Montana-based wedding:

San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom is releasing details on his summer wedding. Newsom will marry actress Jennifer Siebel at her family's Bitterroot River valley ranch in Montana on July 26. The couple sent out some 250 invitations last week. Senator Dianne Feinstein hosted a wedding shower for the couple at her Pacific Heights home over the weekend.

(We always thought DiFi lived in Presidio Terrace? Alas.)

Anyway, we checked our mailbox and didn't see any engraved wedding invite waiting inside for us. Did you? Great. Send it to us. The first Newsom-Siebel wedding invitee to scan and send us their wedding invite will receive a very special, super, amazing gift. So very special, in fact, that we don't even know what it is yet. But we'll dig around the swag bin to find you something super keen.

Image at right: the dude ranch where it will all go down

Clinton and the gays, two things that gets Gavin's tongue wagging.

Man, even in not the most flattering shots, he still looks... flattering. Or at the very least, endearing. Really, the man just doesn't take a bad picture.

Photos by Jim Herd. (Now all he needs to get is one on the right and one darting , and his collection is complete!)

When he's not gracing photo exhibits at Valencia Street art gallery parties with Todd Oldam and John Waters (the latter, we hear, now lives in Nob Hill now. Who knew?) with his stellar bone structure, he's off in D.C. lecturing East Coasters about (alleged) global warming. According to his schedule:

2:00 PM (EST)
Mayor Newsom to testify before the Select Committee on Energy Independence and Global Warming hearing: "Building Green, Saving Green: Constructing Sustainable and Energy-Efficient Buildings."
2358A Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, DC

We miss you, Gavin. Come back.

Little ol' San Francisco made ink in USA Today as part of Mayor Gavin Newsom's clever plan to rule to the state of California.

What pressing issue is he tackling this time? Tobacco in drug stores. Specifically, he wants to ban harmful cigs from places like our beloved Walgreens. Newsom, it seems, "proposed an unprecedented city ban on drugstores selling tobacco products, including cigars, pipes and smokeless tobacco."

"This will be the beginning of a national movement," Newsom Evitas to USA Today.

The article goes on to say that drug stores are places for getting healthy--even though drug stores are one of the top retailers of the mylar food group--and we pretty much agree. Or we just don't care. Smokers will always be able to find their sweet release elsewhere, right?

What say you?

It's been an incredible success, yes? He's gone to Israel in order to (allegedly) build a bridge between the Bay Area and Israeli business leaders. (See what you've wrought, Rainbow Groceries?) And according to his schedule, Newsom started out in NYC today, but will be in WeHo later this afternoon to accept some silly award. Behold:

9:45 AM (EST)
Mayor Newsom to be interviewed by Dana Goodyear for New Yorker magazine's conference: "Stories from the Near Future." Mayor Newsom will highlight San Francisco's environmental accomplishments and address San Francisco's position as a nationally recognized leader for environmental initiatives in a session titled, "The Green City." The IAC Building 555 West 18th Street New York City

5:30 PM
Mayor Newsom to receive award and make brief remarks at West Hollywood awards ceremony.
The Lot
1041 N. Formosa Avenue
Los Angeles, CA

This begs the question: is he flying commercial or private? We wonder. Rumor has it that you can blow rails in the Jetty. But that, of course, is a vile, sick, and totally untrue rumor.

See you at the Abby, Gav.

Mayor Gavin Newsom puffed up his chest yesterday after leading the lawsuit that will "challenge a cut in the reimbursement rates paid to doctors that treat Medi-Cal patients." (That is to say, he's upset that the state has now decided to cut payments to doctors who accept low-income patients. Thanks, Arnold.) But the real story here is whether or not Newsom finally answered the big question about a possible run for Governor of California. And whether or not he's the next Jed Bartlet. KQED's John Myers reports:

[A] decent sized crowd flocked to see the charismatic San Fran pol at today’s event, and it’s hard to deny that many wanted to hear how he answered The Question.

I call it that in homage to an episode of one of my favorite TV series, . In that episode, as the staff prepares for President Jed Bartlet to run for a second term, there’s giddiness when a potential GOP contender flubs what the White House staff keeps calling “the question” from a reporter. In that case, the question was: “Why do you want to be president?”

In Newsom’s case, you probably know the question…

Are you running for governor in 2010?