What self-satisfying San Franciscan wouldn’t want this masturbatory aid called the Coitus Tower? It of course pays homage to the SF’s Coit Tower that was ‘erected’ in 1933.
It is hardly a novel joke to point out that Telegraph Hill’s 210-foot tall Coit Tower is shaped very much like a phallus. (See also Salesforce Tower.) But it is quite novel to design, mass-manufacture, and sell a Coit Tower shaped dildo, known as the “Coitus Tower.” And that is exactly what someone is now doing.
Yes, we really did make a dildo that looks like Coit Tower and named it "Coitus Tower" 🤣https://t.co/nObQdwTeKS
— (((BrokeAssStuart))) (@BrokeAssStuart) August 16, 2023
It may not surprise you how that “someone” is local bon vivant Broke-Ass Stuart, who announced the Coitus Tower on his website Wednesday. The dildo is a collaboration with the “customizable silicone toy” brand Freely, and is being sold via Freely’s online shop.
“For anyone who’s ever said ‘Fuck San Francisco’, now you can!,” Broke-Ass Stuart writes on his blog. “Whether you buy this to pleasure yourself, have it sit on your bookshelf, or send it to your favorite SF hater as a not so subtle ‘up yours’, you’re going to be satisfied."
![](https://img.sfist.com/2023/08/coitus-screenshot.jpg)
As seen above, the Coitus Tower is available in your choice of 11 different colors, and the product is described as “100% body safe platinum-cure silicone.” It’s also phthalate-free, latex-free, and waterproof. The dildo’s maximum width is listed at 1.45 inches, with a respective maximum girth of 4.55 inches. It’s total length is listed at six inches, but with an “insertable length” of 5.4 inches.
The Coitus Tower dildo is priced at $64, which feels like Broke-Ass Stuart missed a “nice” opportunity to price it at $69.
Related: Mission-Based Sex Toy Startup Seeks Seed Money [SFist]
Image: Freely Toys