What's more addictive and more dangerous this time of year than a gram of Tenderloin black tar? "Hey Santa!" by Brian Wilson by proxy. It borders on genius, really. So hooky. So California. So appropriately, yet at the same time blasphemously, casual. Now, of course, it's no Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas Is You" or "Sleigh Ride" by the Ronettes, that's for goddamn sure, but it's up there. Awful and wonderful all at once. What are we talking about? This.

Starting at NOON today, the lightest of light and least of the talk, KOIT 96.5 will begin its annual besiegement of holiday classics. Oh, you want a taste? Here you go. But from today until New Year's, KOIT will burrow a hole to your heart with a tongue-sharpened candy cane. You can't escape it. You'll hear it everywhere. Trust me.

NOTE: Beware of Vic Damone's "Christmas in San Francisco," a tune that, sadly, is one of the worst. Just terrible. A slice of the fruit cake of modern Christmas carols for your consideration: "Maybe eat in Chinatown/Before we trim the tree/And then a North Beach cappucino/Would sure taste good to me."