After hearing word that Starbucks might acquire Emeryville-based Peet's Coffee & Tea, SFist commenter CetiAlphaFive chimed in with the following gem:

I don't usually get so worked up over things like this, but I have a large dosage of caffeine running through my veins and I am furious. I purposefully avoid the 27 Starbucks in my neighborhood and walk a mile for Peete's [sic] to enjoy something that doesn't taste like it came out of some candy unicorn's ass.

I am going to break stuff... I am going to break stuff and pee on somebody!

Breaking stuff? Peeing? Candy unicorn's ass? Perfection.