Driving while drunk is a crime that should, arguably, in a perfect world, be punishable by public beheading. In addition to taking the life of an innocent driver and the lives of many, you ruin a perfectly good automobile and cause even more cumbersome gridlock. And that's not right. Take, for example, Edward Schaefer, a 43-year-old Novato man, who made headlines this week after striking and killing a 9-year-old girl on his motorcycle. After researching "decades' worth of public records," NBC Bay Area uncovered Schaefer's checkered driving record. Check it out: "1990, Marin County - DUI, 6 months in jail, 3 years probation, license suspended 4 years; 1990, Marin County - DUI, 44 days in jail, 3 years probation; 1991, Marin County - DUI, 26 days in jail; 1995, Marin County - DUI, 4 months in jail, 2 years probation, license suspended 3 years, $2,000 fine, ignition device 1 year; 1999, Sonoma County - Alcohol-related Reckless Driving, 30 days in jail. 2 years probation; and 2004, Nevada - DUI." What's more, NBC goes on to report that "Schaefer faced the same Marin County judge in his first four cases." And no one noticed a pattern?! Jesus. Anyway, Schaefer is due back in court on June 19.