COMEDY: One of the greatest human beings on Earth, Patton Oswalt, will delight the drunken masses at Cobb's Comedy Club tonight. Although he's much admired by the McSweeney's set -- he cut his stand-up comedy teeth here in SF -- don't let that scare you off. The man who starred in both The King of Queens and Ratatouille deserves a permanent place in your heart.

7 p.m. // Cobb's Comedy Club (915 Columbus)

MUSIC: OK, we have no idea who Mister Salty, the Red Fox, and K-the-I are. As a matter of fact, we're not sure we want to know; they sound like that hip hop music mother and father always warn us about. But SF Weekly's John Graham seem to enjoy K-the-I's "twisting rhymes and dense, cerebral lyrics," so... there you have it.

9 p.m. // Elbo Room (647 Valencia) // $5