Because city health care programs are under the false impression that they are untouchable bastions of altruism and benevolence, a coalition of community groups, labor, and concerned citizens will hold mock funeral at 12:30 p.m. this afternoon, protesting budget cuts. However, the procession -- which starts at the Civic Center Plaza on the Southwest Green -- will march to City Hall and attempt to offer an alternate list for cuts (e.g., "police collecting overtime to investigate pedestrian right-aways," something called firehouse chauffeurs, Mayoral staff dudeskis, etc.).