[Sorry to go all Noe Valley on you lovely readers, but yes, one more SFist writer is knocked up and ready to rant.]

A Pea in a Pod near Union Square was on the list of dreaded maternity-clothes-shopping destinations when we realized that we could no longer button our jeans. Mistake. Big mistake. APIAP's non-designer jeans (We are not spending $130 on elastic-banded 7 For All Mankinds, thank you very much) come in three sizes; small, medium, and large. Fair enough, right? Wrong. The sizes do not correspond to pant sizes. Oh no, they correspond to the size of the elastic band.

It was really nice of them to set their standard jean size at 4 or 6. We can only guesstimate the actual size based on the way our size-8 ass couldn't quite make it into the denim. After attempting to try on a small, then a medium, and then (holy crap) a large with absolutely no success, we left the store in tears amid a dirty-look assault from a saleswoman who at first was totally sweet. Was it our huge ass that offended her or the huge pile of teeny-tiny jeans we left in the dressing room? We'll never know.

On the bright side, we ventured to Serramonte (we're kinda ashamed to admit) where we discovered Motherhood Maternity and their myriad of affordable denim for ladies of all sizes. A breathe of fresh air after an awful experience.