"What will Grandma say next?" the press releases asks, and "is she single?" WHAT? And then there is also a section entitled "GRANDPARENT INITIATION." We can't even begin to imagine what a "grandparent initiation" ritual could possibly be. Something out of no doubt. Except, wait, wouldn't it actually just be the birth of your grandchildren?

So as far as we can figure out, some PR company is trying to tell us that there's a cruise happening; Cloris is on board; and there's going to be Wiis and grandparents. Also, it's being promoted by a company in Oklahoma, a state known for its videogames, celebrities, and oceangoing vessels. Surely, this cockamamie enterprise CANNOT POSSIBLY FAIL.

Rosemary's Baby