-- Girls soccer coach suspended after mooning (i.e.., "exposing his buttocks to" [hee]) his opponents. [SFGate]

-- Niners' Nolan stands by his QB, Alex Smith. Aw. Also, "at least the Niners didn't get shutout." (Dude. Ouch.) [Examiner, SJ Merc]

-- Increasing lack of loyalty over at Yahoo. [ValleyWag]

-- Neither heavy nor metal, Metallica went acoustic/funk at the Bridge School Benefit. [SJ Merc]

-- 1 dead, 2 hospitalized after shootings in the city of Richmond. [CBS5]

-- Please, for the love of God, take driver's licenses away from scary, scary teenagers. Thanks. [ABC7]