We kinda suspect that the debauchery seen in "Hard to Swallow" -- orgies of muscular men, fluid-spurting phalluses, sexual grave desecrations, gay hookers fondly remembering tricks of yore -- are represetative of how middle-America sees San Francisco, if not Nancy Pelosi's office. Compiled by local artists Justin Hall and Dave Davenport, "HtS" pretty much defines NSFW -- the cover promises "HOT ape-on-pirate action," and when we opened it, the first line of dialogue our eye caught on was "Now that's a f**king load! A little salty, maybe, but you have been floating at sea." We flipped a few pages and read, "muscled armpit! my favorite flavor!" ... then flipped again and landed on "now let's get down to some serious f**king." And that's when we quietly closed the book, our hands shaky and sweating, shifted uncomfortably in our pew, and decided to read the rest AFTER Mass had concluded.

After the jump: sexxxy girls, and underwear pervs at war.