In our email this morning, we saw a disturbing subject line: "Notice of Class Action Settlement. Please Read." "oh, s**t, who's suing us now?" we wondered. But the joke's on us -- apparently, we're the ones doing the suing!

A class action suit, (PDF!) Chavez v. Netflix, Inc., was filed in San Francisco last year, stating that Netflix failed to provide one-day delivery and unlimited DVD rentals, as promised in their marketing materials.

Today, Netflix announced a settlement, where Chavez gets 2 (on top of 2.5 MILLION BUCKS in legal fees -- Rita, are you sure you're in the right law firm?) and the rest of us get a free one-month upgrade in service level. Ungrateful wretches that we are, we feel screwed -- we want 2000 bucks, too! Then again, Chavez did go to the trouble of filing this very important suit, so perhaps we should console ourselves with the fact that we hadn't even heard of the suit until today.

Yee-haw, now we can rent both seasons of "Ali G" and still get . Hey, we may not consider ourselves joiners, but we like us some free stuff. Don't forget, to cash in on this awesome score, sign up by February 17, 2006,

Land of the Dead