So without further adieu, let's hear from Carnal Carl:

I hope you can help me with my recent moral quandary. There is a charming young woman who goes to grad school in the faraway Midwest with whom I have been canoodling whenever she's in town, every two or three months (she's an East Bay native). She is quite lovely and quite charming, and our casual rolls in the hay have been mutually lauded as fun times all around.

At the time of our last cavort, she let slip that she had spent much of her Christmas vacation in LA visiting the family of a boyfriend whose existence I was wholly unaware of, one she's apparently had for many years. She seemed surprised that I had not gleaned this, though I'm not sure how I might have done so (osmosis?). At any rate, what's my moral obligation here? I enjoy this woman's occasional company but am not caught up emotionally at all. At the same time, I'd prefer not to be consigned to Hell or slapped with any karmic retribution down the line.


Carnal Carl

First, let us just say, we did not make that up. That was a real question from a real reader, and we've been sitting on it for like two weeks.

Dear Essefficist,