It's Tuesday again so the Essefficist is back with more Q&A for our loyal readers. Today we bring you answers to your questions about weird hamburgers and pruney toes. Also, for all you nasty freaks out there, we return one last time to the sordid world of Craig's List horndogs.

First, we turn to Anonymous SFist Reader, who wonders,

NYC_Ostrich_Burger.jpgWell, ASFR, you nameless coward, we've eaten a lot of hamburgers around town in our day but never an ostrich burger. A little noodling around on Google, however, led us to Zazie, a French restaurant in Cole Valley that is reputed to serve the fabled African bird on a bun. We called them up and spoke to Catherine, the owner, who told us that they alternate between ostrich burgers and lamb burgers. Right now, it's young sheep, but it seems like they change the menu pretty regulary and it won't be too long until they're serving big flightless bird again. She says is very lean (almost too lean for burgers, in fact), tastes like turkey, and is usually served well-done. They serve ostricich burgers with salad and freedom fries for $8.95.

You can also get a third-pound OB (about six bucks) and a half pound OB (about seven bucks) at a national chain called Fuddruckers in Daly City, Emeryville, and a few other Bay Area cities that require long BART rides to reach. I can't vouch for the beer selection there.

Also, Pittsburgh? College? Geez, what a dork.

Next, Prunegirl asks Why is that that when my boyfriend and I, together or seperately, take a bath, our little fingers and toes are the only G-rated body parts that shrivel? What IS that shriveling all about? And why is it so EXACTLY located?

Is there anywhere in town I can get a cheap (less than $10) ostrich burger? Preferably somewhere with a good beer selection. There's this bar in Pittsburgh that has them, and they are awesome. Yeah, I went to college in Pittsburgh, don't make fun.