A stream of yellow and brown balloons and toilet-humor costumes came out for Sunday’s official opening of the Noe Valley public bathroom that was once supposed to cost $1.7 million, though its cost plopped down to just a few hundred thousand dollars.

It was way back in October 2022, a full year and a half ago, when a Heather Knight mini-exposé in the Chronicle decried that a new public toilet in Noe Valley Town Square was going to cost $1.7 million. That story blew up nationally, and Governor Gavin Newsom yanked the funding unless the city could somehow make it cheaper. Which the city did, when a Nevada company donated a prefab public restroom for free, which arrived last month but still needed its plumbing hook-ups completed before opening.  

The public bathroom technically started functioning last week, but a “Potty Party” was scheduled for Sunday to celebrate its grand opening. And Heather Knight was on the scene again, now in her role with the New York Times, describing the scene at the toilet-themed Noe Valley bathroom opening party where children “sipped lemonade and ate chocolate cupcakes while they tossed bean bags into plastic training potties on the ground.”

The Chronicle has more color from the Potty Party, including video of an acrobat doing a dance routine with a plunger, dressed in full Mario costume.  Apparently about 100 people attended Sunday, and the Chronicle says that “Children circled a maypole clutching long strands of toilet paper,” and we will note that maypole was scatologically decorated.

"Noe Valley, let's hear it for our 'not-1.7-million-dollar-bathroom,'" event organizer Leslie Crawford announced to the crowd, according to KPIX.

And state Assemblymember Matt Haney came too, straight from Cherry Blossom Festival duty, and declared on Facebook that “It wasn't 1.7 million (just a couple hundred thousand) and isn't gold plated, but it's worth its weight in gold to this community!” Note the tightrope act Haney must walk here, considering he’s the one that got the $1.7 million approved before this became a scandal, and he must now pivot from a bring-home-the-bacon lawmaker to a guy who’s appearing to root out government waste.  

The Chronicle notes that the final cost of this prefab public restroom came out to “about $200,000” though we've seen other numbers tossed around in recent months.

Related: Formerly $1.7 Million Toilet Has Arrived In Noe Valley (But Won’t Function For Another Three Weeks) [SFist]

Image: @NoeValleyDems via Twitter

The head that made headlines for nearly a year and a half over its initial $1.7 million price tag has finally squatted down in Noe Valley, but it won’t be up and flushing until the end of the month.

When the news came out in October 2022 that the Noe Valley Town Square was getting a public restroom that would cost $1.7 million, that shocking seven-figure cost released a load of controversy. But a Nevada company stepped into the mess and donated a free prefab toilet, which the city happily accepted. Still, the city’s red tape still gave the restroom’s installation some timeline over-runs, and we last heard in February that the public toilet would be “delivered” on March 7.

And it actually was delivered on Thursday, March 7. “The eagle has landed!,” the SF Rec and Parks Department declared on Twitter Thursday. “A few final touches, like utility & landscaping, & this project will be in the can by the end of March.”

Wait, why will it take another three weeks for this already-built toilet to start functioning? The image above was taken Wednesday evening at the toilet’s installation site, the night before the toilet’s arrival from the Nevada-based Public Restroom Company.

“This area will be closed for six weeks beginning mid-February 2024 for construction,” the site’s signage explains. “Recreation and Parks will be installing a new restroom structure, including related utilities, and landscaping.”

Peeping over the fence at the site at 24th Street between Church and Sanchez streets, we saw Wednesday that there is a fair amount of plumbing work and other infrastructure installation that still needs to be done.

But Rec and Park does have this rendering of what the toilet will look like once installed.

So this whole saga will likely finally have a happy outcome by the end of March. Though if you’re in the area of Noe Valley Town Square and really need a bathroom, there is still a porta-potty available at the site.

Related: ‘$1.7 Million Toilet’ Controversy Toilet Comes Out OK In the End, Supes Approve Lower-Cost Project [SFist]

Top Image: @RecParkSF via Twitter

Hey, remember that “$1.7 million toilet” that had the local media flush with outrage back in 2022? The cost got squeezed down, but still no toilet, and it won’t be plopped down 'til April at the earliest.

San Francisco media outlets had their underpants in a bunch with the October 2022 revelation that one single public toilet at the Noe Valley Town Square was estimated to cost $1.7 million — which was held up as an example of SF's absurd and bloated bureaucracy, because a lot of that cost was just planning and design. The whole thing was slated to be paid for by state funding anyway, or it was until Governor Gavin Newsom threatened to yank the funding appropriation unless the cost came down.

Sweet relief arrived when a pre-fab bathroom manufacturer offered to donate a free toilet, which would bring the cost to around $300,000, and the new, more affordable loo was approved in April 2013.

But hey, did we ever get that public toilet at Noe Valley Town Square? To this day, we have not.

Former Chronicle and now New York Times columnist Heather Knight, who broke the original toilet-gate story, is back on the case. Heather Knight's latest “My Latest” is an NY Times investigation into whatever happened with that toilet plan, which found that it’s still — not shockingly — hunkered down in city bureaucracy. It picks up the story in this past December, when SF Rec and Parks was apparently pretty huffy with the company donating the toilet, Nevada-based Public Restroom Company.

“Your team was unresponsive to our repeated attempts to engage,” the December letter from Rec and Parks reportedly said. “We are receiving inquiries from citizens, journalists and local lawmakers on the status of this highly publicized project. We will need to answer questions.”

Public Restroom Company president Chad Kaufman contended that other City Hall departments were still tying him up with permits, but the end is in sight.

The headline of this post declares the pre-fab bathroom is “still not built.” But it is built, alright, just not in Noe Valley. It has technically been constructed and is sitting in a yard in Minden, Nevada.

“My portion is done,” Kaufman told the Times.

The model is likely to look a little like what's seen above, though it may be slightly different, as this is just one of the Public Restroom Company’s models. But the Times reports that Public Restroom Company currently assesses it will be delivered to the Noe Valley Town Square in the next couple of months, and “should be ready for use by April.”

Related: $1.7 Million Noe Valley Public Toilet Will Now Only Cost the City $300K [SFist]

Image: Thomas D. via Yelp

A highly hyped new SF bathroom hailed as “the future of public toilets” lasted only three days into said future, as the high-tech bathroom kiosk quickly had to be relieved of its duty and found itself closed for repairs.

A brand new, sleek, high-tech, free public restroom was unveiled Wednesday with great fanfare and a big to-do press conference at its foot-of-Market-Street location. The Chronicle gave the new loo a glowing writeup calling it "The future of public toilets," with an architect from the toilet kiosk’s design firm SmithGroup saying, “The idea is to make it as indestructible as possible,” and “We spent a lot of (design) time coming up with something to look at that would also be simple and durable from a technical standpoint.”

But about that “durable” part. The new public bathroom broke down Friday afternoon, on just the third day after its ballyhooed opening. As of Saturday morning, technicians were still at work on the out-of-service kiosk.

The trouble appears to have started Friday afternoon around 4:30 p.m. As seen above, it sure looks like the commode got stuck out of place during the unit's self-cleaning cycle. SFist heard the on-duty attendant tell a supervisor that “some lady went in there,” and after she came out, the mechanized commode had not lowered back into the sitting position following the self-cleaning cycle.

The attendant and supervisor did not seem thrilled that we were taking pictures and asking questions.

Repairs were still underway Saturday morning, with technicians on the scene. They simply told us, “it’s not working,” with no timeline for the bathroom’s reopening.

You’ll notice the technicians' vests say JCDecaux, which is the Paris-based "street furniture" and advertising company that operates and maintains these 25 toilet kiosks around town (the ones you’re used to seeing are green and vintage-looking, while this new stainless steel unit is the first of their modernized replacements). JCDecaux also operates 114 additional non-bathroom advertising kiosks around the city, all of which are transitioning to this new stainless steel exterior, with this Ferry Building bathroom kiosk being the first new one introduced.

But JCDecaux did not actually design these kiosks, which are apparently the first of their kind. The aforementioned design firm SmithGroup designed them, and they’re called “AmeniPods.” SmithGroup says in a press release that “The new public toilets will be unique to San Francisco,” and SmithGroup’s Projects page does not list AmeniPods as being in use anywhere other than San Francisco. So they’re pretty brand new, and may not have been  largely tested.

That said, SmithGroup is just the design firm, JCDecaux is responsible for the maintenance and upkeep of these kiosks, and SF Public Works administers the contract.

"The first new JCDecaux toilet at Embarcadero Plaza opened on Wednesday to the public for real-life testing." Public Works said in a Monday, November 28 statement to SFist. "As expected with a new mechanical system, there will be small technical adjustments during this early usage period. JCDecaux has technicians standing by and has assured Public Works that they will troubleshoot any mechanical problem as quickly as possible."

Public Works adds that "The toilet was offline for about two hours during business hours (9 a.m. to 5 p.m.) over the weekend." That said, SFist visited the toilet on Friday at 4:45 p.m., Saturday morning at 9:15 a.m., and Saturday afternoon at 4:30 p.m., and the unit was out of operation on all three of those visits.

And sure, it probably won’t be long until this thing is fixed and back up again. This is a nice design and (when working) a great free amenity for the general public. But honestly, Day Three is pretty early for this so-called toilet of the future to already be breaking down and needing serious repairs.

All 25 of these kiosks will eventually take on the same stainless steel exterior (and interior parts seen above) as this just-broken one near the Ferry Building. Media coverage of these new toilets has noted that the city isn’t charged anything for them, as JCDecaux handles maintenance and installation costs in exchange for the advertising space.

But with this new “futuristic” model now in the fritz, we may be getting what we paid for with these free public toilets.  

Note: This post was updated on Monday, November 28 with a statement from San Francisco Public Works.

Related: BART Makes a Big To-Doo Over Finally Reopening the Bathrooms at Powell Street Station [SFist]

Images: Joe Kukura, SFist

BART made a big stink over its new all-gender, shiny new bathrooms at Powell Street stations, in a grand opening celebration complete with a toilet paper-cutting ceremony.

BART has been trying to tinkle around with reopening the bathrooms at its underground stations since at least 2016, but they’ve had to hold it for a number of years. As BART explains, “After the 9/11 attacks, the Department of Homeland Security ordered BART to shut down underground restrooms as they saw it as a security risk. The recommendation from DHS stayed in place for many years.” Even once they got permission to let it rip, they found the facilities “needed ADA compliance, entirely new plumbing and ventilation, removing hazardous materials installed in the 1970s, etc.” As such, ten BART stations have not had bathrooms for about 20 years.

But the first of those reopened bathrooms is good to go. They promised us last week that the Powell Street bathroom would reopen February 2, and on Wednesday, they reopened that bathroom with the great fanfare of a press conference.

Was BART making a Number Two joke by opening these on 2/2/22? They were, and we’re mad they beat us to it. Of course, BART is taking a lot of shit on Twitter over announcing this via a press conference, which involved a toilet paper-cutting ceremony, and drew the likes of State Senator Scott Wiener.

Per BART’s own description, these are "All-gender restrooms” with “bright LED lights” and “no main door but with stalls” just like at SFO. They also say they'll have “full-time attendants at the Powell restroom to provide staff presence,” though that is only a short-term pilot program.

You can take a little tour above, courtesy SFBay.

And what the deuce, that’s blogger Michael Petrelis there for the bathroom opening! It almost seems like a homage to the SFist comments section from back in 2012, after Petrelis was busted photographing then-supervisor Scott Wiener in a public washroom. We thought those jokes would never get old! (They did.) But if Wiener and Petrelis have since mended fences and are now doing bathroom grand opening promotions together, well, that is just hilarious.

There are more bathroom openings to come, probably with less fanfare. Oakland’s 19th Street station gets its john on this coming February 25, and others will be staggered, until the 24th Street station opens it bathrooms in (sigh) 2026.

Related: BART to Reopen Bathrooms, Modernize Stations at Powell Street and 19th Street In Oakland [SFist]

Image: @sfbart via Twitter

San Francisco is poised to take a step toward common sense, as legislation introduced by Supervisor David Campos to make all single-occupancy restrooms within the city all-gender was approved in committee yesterday. So reports KRON 4, which further notes that if it becomes law, the legislation will require business owners to change signage on the bathrooms as well as mandate the inclusion of all-gender restrooms in future developments.

If approved by the full Board of Supervisors, the new law would provide protection for gender non-conforming and transgender individuals who just want to pee in peace. It also obviously stands in stark contrast to a recently approved North Carolina law that, according to New York Magazine, bars people from using bathrooms that don't match the gender on their birth certificate.

"I know we are on the right side of history,” KRON 4 reports Campos as noting. When he introduced the legislation this past January, the Bay Area Reporter reports Campos as further explaining that this is "something that should have been done many, many years ago."

"Transgender and gender-nonconforming people frequently experience harassment in toilet facilities," BAR reports a draft of the legislation as reading. "Required use of gender-specific toilet facilities can create unnecessary risk that leads to transgender and gender-nonconforming people being denied access, being verbally harassed, or physically assaulted in these facilities. These experiences, in turn, impact one's education, employment, health, and participation in public life."

Similar legislation is making its way through Sacramento, as KRON 4 notes that San Francisco Assemblyman Phil Ting introduced a bill last month that would require single-occupancy restrooms in public spaces, businesses, and government buildings be designated as all-gender.

Previously: Campos Wants To Make All Single-Person Bathrooms 'All Gender'

In the annual contest thrown by the bathroom aficionados at Cintas, the facilities at Valencia Street's own noted typewriter repair shop/vintage home decor emporium/basement poetry slam space Viracocha have been nominated as one of ten finalists for the nation's best.

"This eclectic vintage store has become one of the Mission District’s most popular destinations," the contest site notes with aplomb, "predominantly for its posh potty - which patrons say resembles a 'Zen retreat' so magical you will wish you could live in it." In addition to the usual seating arrangements one might find in a single-head restroom, the spacious backroom also features a Victorian tub filled with river stones and a plush armchair — in case you think you might need to relax for a little while longer.

The good folks of Viracocha also had a few words about the nomination:

SO.... over the past 3 & half years of our operation, we have noticed a couple of recurring comments. None more so, probably, than the numerous references to our bathroom. It seems people have a tendency to enjoy their time, within our humble lavatory, and have nominated us amongst other notable restrooms across the nation.

Viracocha's enchanting restroom is up against some stiff competition this year: rounding out the other nine nominees are the Waldorf Astoria in New York, glass-walled public restrooms in Texas, an arcade in Portland, an airport bathroom in Tampa, and a mall bathroom in New Jersey. Readers and fellow restroom enthusiasts are encouraged to go vote for the best restroom, since we can't have San Francisco losing a national title to some mall in New Jersey.

Previously: Gitane Named A Finalist For Nation's Best Restroom

Anyone who's ever tried visiting the restroom at the San Francisco Main Library knows that it's basically one of the biggest mistakes of your life. The intensity of the urine stench defies science, the clientele have little demonstrable interest in books, and one intrepid SFist writer saw someone defecate in the sink for no particular reason (other than for, well, you know).

And now, a particularly dispiriting Examiner article that seeks to highlight the library's efforts at keeping said bathrooms tolerable instead hits home the message that the problem is never, ever going away.

According to Roberto Lombardi, director of facilities, there won't be full-time bathroom attendants or user fees, but there will be routine monitoring and overnight cleaning. That's a new concept, apparently. But will hourly maintenance inspections solve the problem?

"You can be there on a given hour and they look perfectly fine," said library chief Luis Herrera. "Within 20 minutes, you go back and it needs maintenance." So for 40 minutes out of every hour, the bathrooms will still be ghastly. Herrera has some good news, though. "There hasn't been a fatal overdose in the bathrooms since 2006." Hurrah!

In 2007, the library took the groundshaking liberty of banning sex, indecent exposure and drug use. That's only 11 years after the new library opened, so there's that. But what about the problem of the toilets constantly clogged with foreign objects?

"We do not have plumbers on staff," stated Lombardi. But here's something, perhaps, to be hopeful about: the library does have "sewage grinders" that "will make handiwork out of cans, books, clothes, you name it." So basically a garbage disposal, but in the toilet.

In conclusion, do not ever, ever attempt use the bathrooms at the Main Library.

[Examiner]

Rampant disregard for clean lines and open, airy spaces shot by Erik Wilson.

The San Francisco Municipal Transport Agency is currently at work on a project that will install 36 bathrooms on the sidewalk along bus routes so Muni operators can have a spot to go run and pee real quick while on the job. This makes sense. Everybody has to pee sometimes. But there are some forces in town who rather see these Muni operators afflicted with kidney disease than give up more precious sidewalk space.

At $170,000 a pop, the bathrooms aren't exactly cheap, but as a spokesman for the Transit Workers Union told a Board committee yesterday, you can't put a price on a convenient place to pee:

"We refuse to be treated as second-class citizens in regards to using a restroom while serving the public and The City," said Ronald Austin, vice president of Local 250-A. "If there is a concern about a restroom costing $170,000, I have to ask how much does it cost for The City in workers' compensation costs for renal failure of an operator? I think it's a lot more than $170,000."

The private pissoirs would stand about 10 feet tall and take up an 8-by-11-foot space on sidewalks already crowded with newspaper stands, those sketchy toilets, AT&T equipment boxes and other people hurriedly walking towards the nearest Starbucks with a merciful bathroom policy. Board President David Chiu's alternative solution would be to make agreements with local businesses where Muni operators could pee freely. Muni currently pays out $4,000 - $5,000 per year to local businesses for these sorts of bathroom privileges.

Speaking of having to pee real bad while on the bus: partying on Muni is quickly becoming a thing. It's been a long-held open secret that the historic streetcars on the F-Market line are available for charter. (The boat car's annual participation in the Pride parade, for example.) What we didn't know was that Muni actually has a very liberal policy towards alcohol during these chartered rides. It's really more of a pack-it-in-pack-it-out policy. During a party organized by an enterprising friend of SFist back in March, a gascan full of pre-mixed Manhattans and a pony keg of Sierra Nevada came aboard one of the lovely Milan cars. And the wonderful driver barely even batted an eye as riders sloshed around from Dolores Park to Fisherman's Wharf and back.

Noted Internet magazine and party sponsor The Bold Italic is throwing the party again next week and tickets have apparently sold out in less than 24 hours. It is officially the only time anyone is actually clamoring to hand over money and hop aboard Muni. Granted, for a few hours, that Muni car will be the only moving bar in town and there will be cocktails, but there's not even a bathroom.

Anyhow, it strikes us as only a matter of time before some techie type comes along to do their disruption thing and sell tickets to F-Line parties in order to fund improvements to the rest of our unreliable transit system. That would be more productive than complaining about BART at least. Either that or we equip all our Muni drivers with corporate sponsored bathroom finder apps.

[SFEx]

Attention all trough queens: Midnight Sun is getting a much-needed facelift. The gay video bar will get windows and a lounge area in the front -- did you know it's one of the few remaining SF gay bars that still has no windows? -- which is now occupied by bathrooms. And one bathroom, as some of you know, includes a trough. A trough filled with ice. Because, next to heroin's sweet release and peeling the plastic film from a new remote control, nothing is as satisfying as peeing into a urinal full of ice.

Some are very sad about this. Rightfully so. Castro Biscuit commenter Joe pours forth the following memory about his time in the john at Midnight Sun. Ahem:

Since my homosexual youth, I have enjoyed peeing in ice at the trough. Watching the ice melt under my heavy beer stream.

Had my first water sports experience at this urinal. 20+ years later and I can still remember the whole experience.

I was so very sad (really-truly) to learn this wonderful pissing tradition of the Midnight Sun and the Castro of my youth, will no longer be part of the new ADA restroom plans.

Better head over boys, it’s our last chance. Enjoy!!!

You, Joe, are the hero of the day. But fear not, sir! One can simply stumble down to Moby Dick's to pee with abandon, trough-style. Or, if the mood should strike, head over to Bar None in the Marina. They've got a big pee-pee tub too, featuring lots of men. You're welcome.

Midnight Sun: 4067 18th Street (at Castro)

It is said, by some, that a chef can be judged by their roast chicken. The same could be said of a restaurant and its bathroom; the place where we find relief in the place in which we are find dining relief. An amuse-bouce setting, if you will. For some, checking out the bathroom is a highlight when dining out at a new place. Which is why we bring you Sweet Relief, a new feature of the bathroom(s) at Michelin-starred or SF Chronicle four-star restaurants in the Bay Area.

Besides, everything food-related has been done to death in the media.

While we won't feature unsavory instances that go on in or around the toilet -- we'll leave that to Table and Throne -- we will snap a few pics of loos in the Bay Area's most esteemed restaurants for your viewing pleasure. After all, the meal you eat is going to end up here anyway. The restaurant bathroom: the great food equalizer. From farm to table to toilet.

First up, Saison. Joshua Skenes' transfer from the Mission to SoMa proved a wise decision. The place is downright gorgeous. The can ain't too bad, either. (We didn't show the toilet itself since it was kind of boring.)

A 26-year-old man from Grass Valley, California was arrested Sunday evening after assaulting a 21-year-old victim in a bathroom at AT&T Park during the always tense Giants-Dodgers series this weekend. According to police, the suspect Christopher Torii Smith approached the victim in one of the ballpark bathrooms, attacked him, and kept beating on him as he fell to the ground.

The suspect fled the men's room, but was later spotted by the fuzz and placed under arrest outside the ballpark at Lefty O'Doul Plaza. He was arrested on suspicion of battery, vandalism and public intoxication. Smith, it turns out, is also charged with two counts of driving under the influence for an incident last December in which he fatally struck two people in a crosswalk in Incline Village, Nevada on the North side of Lake Tahoe, allegedly while high on marijuana.

The victim in Sunday's assault came away from the incident with only a busted lip, SFPD reports. Cops have yet to determine if the attack was rivalry-motivated.

[SFEx]

Lots of restaurants offer dinner and drinks, but as we've learned today, few are willing to provide Gitane's level of service as they make their eventual exit. The Chronicle three-star spot on Claude Lane was just named a finalist in Cintas' America's Best Restroom contest, which cites its "bold wallpaper, fus[ed] with luxe fabrics and romantic furniture to create a warm, eclectic and glam interior." (Yes, that sentence was, in fact, written about a bathroom.)

Interior designer Charles Doell, who's responsible for the glamorous commode, is up against some stiff competition, notably Arizona's Liberty Market, which offers individual themed playlists in each of its five unisex stalls, and Vanity Nightclub at the Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas (also designed by Doell), which features gold-plated faucets, flat-screens over the urinals, and a $40,000 hand-blown glass chandelier.

One sign that Gitane might not ascend to the throne: it has already fallen in two local competitions, losing out to the $5,000, J. Lo-approved Japanese crapper at now-shuttered Bushi-Tei in the 2011 Eater Awards and failing to make the cut for The Bold Italic's "Royal Flush" piece on the city's best bathrooms (though someone did give it a boost in the comments).

The winner of the contest will be decided by popular vote, so head over to Cintas' site if you want to show your support for the Gitane bathroom. While you're there, check out the hilarious Old West-themed convenience-store restroom at Texas chain Buc-ee's, which boasts 83 stalls to complement its 80 soda fountains. Texans must find our restroom preferences so quaint.

[Chronicle, Inside Scoop]

What in the?! Who is defecating with such frequency on our BART station escalators that, after it oozes down and gums up the machinery, it is causing them to break? Well, according to SF Chronicle, the homeless are to blame. It seems that, in the middle of the city's white-hot mid-Market area, residence-free denizens have been pooping en masse at the bottom of the stairwells at the BART Civic Center station after it closes. And it's now an even bigger issue.

The Chronicle reports:

All those biological excretions can gum up the wheels and gears of BART's escalators, shutting them down for long periods of extended repairs, increasing station cleaning costs and creating an unpleasant aroma for morning commuters.

Five of the nine escalators that weren't working at BART stations on Wednesday were in downtown San Francisco, said Jim Allison, a BART spokesman. While there are many reasons a BART escalator can break down, the beating they take at night is among the most acute.

Even a hazardous-materials team had to be called in to deal with the stinky situation.

The problem, among so many, is that authorities cannot cite the mad poopers unless they're caught in the act. "Bottom stairwell of Civic Center station" is a beat no cop would want. Also, the lack of public restrooms open late in the area is also to blame.

Sorry to ruin your breakfast/lunch.