In Biggest Hunky Jesus Contest Ever, Ensemble Group ‘Haus of Jesus’ Takes Crown, and We Have Videos

JFC, there were more than 50 Jesuses competing for the coveted Hunky Jesus title Sunday at the annual Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Easter party, including several ensemble-cast groups with puppets and stage productions.

There was a definite fierceness to Saturday’s “Drag Up! Fight Back!” rally, but Sunday’s annual Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Easter in Dolores Park was more just good old fashioned blasphemy and happy vibes. More than 10,000 people came out in the egg-cellent Easter Sunday weather, and with more than 50 people competing in the Hunky Jesus contest (including three large ensemble groups), it had to have been the biggest Hunky Jesus contest ever. We saw a Poppers Jesus, a Mid-Life Crisis Jesus, and a Balenciaga Jesus. (“I invite you to walk with me on the runway of Christ,” he quipped.)

And there some pretty sweet outfits, even among those who were not competing for the Hunky Jesus title.

Here are your winners of the Hunky Jesus and Foxy Mary contests. You can barely see Foxy Mary winner Free Choice Mary (far right), for there are so many members of the winning troupe Haus of Jesus.

The final round of the Hunky Jesus contest is above. Sister Roma told the contestants, “Should one of you win, this will be one of the most important moments of your lives But you responsibilities are absolutely none.”

Here are your winners, the ensemble-cast Haus of Jesus.

But they faced stiff competition from Oily Jesus, another large group.

And we’re not quite sure what to say about this fetus Jesus called Fesus that took a while to get started (drawing a few heckles), but eventually emerged from a giant egg.

And hey, we even had a Newlywed Jesus, who was in fact just married!

Speaking of Mary-ed, yes, that is a pregnant Mary above competing in the Foxy Mary contest.

But as mentioned, Free Choice Mary was the winner of that competition. “When the angel came to me, he said, ‘Do you want to have this baby?’ and I said OK. He gave me a choice,” Free Choice Mary said. "But a lot of my son's fans don't’ respect that choice for other people.”