by Daisy Barringer
I guess we should have all known the 49ers would win yesterday. After all, since Harbaugh took over as head coach, the team has not lost three games in a row. Still: I think it’s safe to say that after the performances we witnessed against the Bears and the Cardinals, there was a real concern we wouldn’t be able to pull out the W. And, yes, there are still some things to be worried about (I’m looking at you special teams and you Greg Roman), but for the most part, the 49ers looked solid in their 26-21 win on Sunday over the Philadelphia Eagles.
It was a sweet victory made that much sweeter because Eagles fans are just The Worst. It was some Eagles fans who cornered me in a bathroom during a Monday Night Football game at Veteran’s Stadium in 1997 and threatened to beat me up (the Niners won). Eagles fans are the ones who boo Santa Claus, throw batteries at players, and worst of all insist on singing that stupid “Fly Eagles, Fly” song after every touchdown and then because somehow that’s not loud or obnoxious enough for them follow it up with an “E-A-G-L-E-S: Eagles!” chant. (As I pointed out yesterday, it is somewhat of a relief to at least know they can spell.)
Not even five minutes had passed after the 49ers lost to the Cardinals and I was inundated with loser Eagles fans talking smack on my Facebook and Twitter. There’s an etiquette that comes along with being a jerk and they can’t even get that right. (Note: You wait a few days. You have all week. No need to kick a girl while she’s already down.)
All of this is to say: SUCK IT EAGLES FANS!!!! YOU’RE TERRIBLE. YOUR OFFENSE COULDN’T SCORE A SINGLE POINT AND IF NOT FOR OUR DYSFUNCTIONAL SPECIAL TEAMS, WE WOULD HAVE DEMOLISHED YOU ON THE SCOREBOARD AS WELL AS ON THE FIELD. ALSO: YOU LOOK LIKE MORONS WHEN YOU FLAP YOUR LITTLE BIRD HANDS AND LITERALLY NO ONE LIKES YOU.
Okay! I feel better.
Seriously though: the Eagles looked pretty terrible. Take these stats:
4 turnovers (2 INTs, 2 fumbles)
Zero points on offense
22 yards rushing - TOTAL
Only 1 play that gained 20+ yards
I mean: that’s horrible football.
Luckily for the Eagles, they were able to capitalize on some really bad play on the special teams, including a blocked punt that was recovered in the San Francisco end zone to put Philadelphia up 7-0 right off the bat. Punt returner Darren Sproles also managed to totally blow by 49ers’ coverage during a punt in the second quarter and take it all the way to the end zone.
The Eagles also capitalized on a Kaepernick interception at the start of the second quarter, returning it for a touchdown.
But in most cases, in order to win a football game, a team’s offense needs to put up points. Or at least, you know: be on the field for more than 17 minutes and 43 seconds.
Yeah, this San Francisco victory is really thanks to our defense who had a tremendous game all around. The Eagles tried to get us with their no-huddle offense, but it didn’t work. I mean, they didn’t even cross the 50-yard line until there was just under five minutes remained in the game. To be fair, they looked great on that drive and I was nervous they were going to score a touchdown which would have been terrible considering the Niners were out of timeouts thanks to a stupid challenge by Harbaugh. (Are any challenges by Harbaugh ever not stupid?) But the Niners defense didn’t let bad coaching decisions ruin the day for them. No, they let the Eagles get all the way to the one-yard-line and then they completely shut them down. Twice.
It was a thing of beauty to watch from the stands. And the crowd went wild.
The crowd at Levi’s Stadium was actually a lot better this week. There were still a ridiculous amount of empty seats, but there were far fewer Eagles fans than I expected and people finally seemed to get into the game. Granted, for 49ers fans that means they occasionally stood up on third downs and were only sometimes inappropriately loud while the Niners were on offense. We’re a work in progress. (And by “we” I mean “everyone else” but it felt rude to say it the other way.) At the end of the game though, it really did seem like everyone wearing red was screaming as loudly as he could and finally understood that being a fan at a game is not just about watching football, but also about participating.
And by participating, I don’t mean getting in fights with Eagles fans, although that did seem to be happening quite a lot. I didn’t witness too many fights from my seats, but when I asked a security guy mid-way through the 3rd quarter why beer sales had already ended, his response was as follows:
“When the jail cells downstairs are full, the beer sales upstairs are cut off.”
I blame the Eagles fans. May their hangovers and this loss haunt them all day.
Of course, the 49ers wouldn’t be 2-2 if not for the offense. There were some serious issues (I’m legitimately over Greg Roman and his incredibly conservative play calling), but there were also some serious highlights.
I’m looking at you Frank Gore, who the Niners finally remembered is the guy who helps us win games, and had 24 attempts for 119 yards. I’m looking at you Anquan Boldin, who kept his head in the game and brought down 5 receptions for 62 yards. I’m looking at you Crabtree (5 catches for 43 yards) and you Brandon Lloyd (2 catches for 28 yards) and I’m also looking at you Stevie “magic feet” Johnson for that incredible touchdown reception. (Also sorry, I will never call you “magic feet” again; that’s the dumbest nickname ever.)
I was concerned at times about Kaepernick’s performance and decisions, and sadly, I’m starting to suspect that’s just what it’s going to be like with him as our QB. He seems unable to manage the clock and he also just looks sloppy and confused at times. But then he does things like make that pass all the way across the field to a wide-open Frank Gore who runs the ball in for the touchdown and you’re like, “Okay. FINE. You can stay our quarterback.”
I’m also a little concerned about the 49ers offensive line, but with Anthony Davis injured (he barely got a chance to play on Sunday before he was knocked out of the game during a Colin Kaepernick sack), it’s to be expected.
In addition, even though I obviously don’t want Vernon Davis to be injured (he says he isn’t worried about whatever took him out of the game yesterday), it is good to see that the Niners don’t absolutely have to have him on the field. If you recall, it wasn’t so long ago that it seemed like VD was the only guy who Kap ever targeted. It’s nice to see that we have a million (okay, a few) more wide out options and that Kap is actually utilizing them. Also, nice work on Bruce Miller’s part stepping up when Vernon went down.
All in all: it was a great day of 49ers football. Sure, there were some tense moments, but my new trick is not to freak out until I absolutely have to. It worked yesterday; we’ll see if it works next week against the Chiefs. Fun game. Fun crowd. And though it is still a disaster getting out of the parking lots at Levi’s Stadium, all in all, I’m not as down on the experience as I was after the Bears game (a win will do that). I would, however, like to know though why the stands smelled like baby diarrhea for most of the game. I’d like to think it was just the Eagles pooping their pants, but I fear there is a sewage problem at the stadium. And on that lovely note: GO NINERS!
