Hey, bro. Not sure if you heard, but noted nude model and 49ers QB Colin Kaepernick might be into other guys, at least that's the silly question posed by Queerty. The simple answer? No. The long answer? Probably not, but anything's possible, right? Whatever feels good, you know. Look, we're just two dudes who sometimes like other guys. We're not into Lady Gaga or RuPaul or that shit. Fuck that. I mean, what guy, under the siren song of an empty whiskey bottle and a bag of Peruvian flake, isn't a touch curious? Do you mind if I take my shirt off? It's tight and my muscles are sore from working out. Anyway, Queerty has the probably untrue details:
Word on the street is that San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick was seen getting “cozy” and “comfortable” with openly gay circuit DJ Luis Perez at the Sports Illustrated Super Bowl party last weekend. Another gay false alarm, or secret gay power couple to watch?
Pictures of the handsome pair together sparked rumors after Perez posted them to his Facebook page (here and here), only to be mysteriously taken down and tucked away within a matter of hours. Maybe the photos were unflattering? Maybe their love is nothing more than a bromance? Maybe Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black were just friends having coffee together, right?
And that he's (not) dating a "gay circuit party DJ!" That's the the whiff of poppers on this str8-acting/appearing cake, isn't it? The nerve. No love for the San Francisco alteraqueer, it seems. No appreciation for the politically-charged man who has so carefully, so self-consciously eschewed deodorant/Castro Queen-ism? (Somewhere in heaven, a drag queen with facial hair sheds a tear.) We should point out, though, that Kap had a longtime girlfriend (that he dumped shortly after landing an NFL contract.) And if the Manti Te'o scandal proved one thing, it's that this world is full of carefully orchestrated coverups.
Speaking of fancy, GQ recently asked Kaepernick in an interview: "What got you more razzed by your teammates, the GQ cover or the nude ESPN cover?" His response: "The ESPN cover. It came on very quickly as far as comments and people messing with it. I mean, it was all in good fun. But the GQ cover comes up when they think I’m acting fancy."
That's one word for it. I kid, Kap! Sort of. Maybe. Who knows. Sigh.