This is why we can't have nice things kegs. A year after Fourth of July festivities left Fort Mason's Great Meadow littered with empty 12-packs, glass bottles, and all manner of summer holiday jetsam, park officials have officially banned glass bottles and kegs from the area.
A National Park Service spokesperson cited the mounds of trash left behind last year for the reason, and said that there will be even more trash and recycle bins this to avoid a repeat problem. If you'll recall, last year's cleanup crew had to content with everything from raw meat, three abandoned barbecues, a couch, and terrifying mountains of trash. It was truly a disgusting display of human apathy.
No word on whether actual kegs were left behind at the scene, but we can only assume the ban has something to do with avoiding the blackout drunkenness that makes conscientious recycling a distinct challenge.
Although park officials note that barbecue grills and charcoal have never been allowed on the green, this reporter was on the scene last year and can confirm that the dozens of grills were only outnumbered by the cornhole sets, which made it difficult to navigate without being struck by a wayward bean bag. In light of this, it remains unclear how compliant tomorrow's revelers will be to the new rules.
And now, allow us a short PSA: If you're planning on spending Independence Day drinking and carousing with friends, more power to you. But don't be that dick who leaves mountains of trash behind (or even a few bottles -- still dickish!). Be prepared for that moment when most of your inebriated group has stumbled home and you're left holding the garbage bag. Our advice? Pack some Hefty bags before you get going to make cleanup easier, and gift each departing friend with a bag of trash or box full of empties to dispose of on their way out. A polite but firm, "Don't be a dick, bro" should do the trick.
Previously: Marina Garbage Trashes Fort Mason...Again
