It seems like only yesterday we were indulging the Marina's finest scrotum-gazing bros in their quest for drinking superiority in the name of charity, and yet here we are again: It's time to nominate your favorite and/or d-baggiest representative of the 94123 for the 2013 Mr. Marina Competition. What separates a great contestant from the rest of Marina landfill, you ask? According to the contest organizers at Slap Cancer, the ideal Mr. Marina is someone who:
Regularly runs along Crissy Field
Enjoys a Balboa Burger with a side of cougar
Has attempted to pick up a date at the Bay Street Safeway
Has been known to pop collar(s) and wear pastels
Can see the Golden Gate Bridge from his rooftop when the fog disappears
In addition to being able to emulate a walking, talking Ken Doll, contestants will be expected to raise at least $1,000 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and a large part of the final judging is based on how much each contestant raises before the beauty pageant itself. Note that contestants don't necessarily need to reside in the Marina, but they do need to perfectly embody those neighborhood values.
In addition to mountains of good karma for raising money for the LLS, this year's winner Chris Clark was awarded (among other things):
- An engraved plaque with his name at Union Street hall of beer pong Bar None
- bottomless mimosas every Saturday at CIRCA for a year
- 10% off Uber cab rides that end in the Marina
- $100 to Mas Sake, where Don Johnson was once accused of being too handsy with the waitstaff
- An $8 vodka soda* named after him at Balboa Café
- 12 months worth of Mantanks, which are tank tops with pictures on them.
If you or someone you know is ready to cash in on your mountains of Union Street Cred, the nomination form can be found right over here. The deadline for nominations is December 14th, 2012 and this year's pageant will go down sometime in early or mid-March.
(*To be fair $1 from every Mr. Marina drink sold goes to the LLS)