By Daisy Barringer
Earlier this week, one of the two people who reads this called me out for my prediction that the Eagles would beat the 49ers this Sunday. Well, Matthew Lynch, while I hate to cut my readership in half, I think you should probably stop here because you’re not going to like what comes next. (And, for the record, neither do I, but it’s my JOB to at least attempt to be rational and honest. And I’ll have you know that I only attempt to do those things when I’m getting paid for it; sorry anyone I’ve ever dated!)
But before we get into actual football, can we stop for a second to talk about how annoying Eagles’ fans are? Sure, they probably feel the same way about me after that one time I threw beer on them, but whatever. They totally deserved it. Have you heard that annoying song they sing?
“Fly Eagles fly, On the road to victory.
Fight Eagles fight, Score a touchdown 1-2-3.
Hit ‘em low.
Hit ‘em high.
And we’ll watch our Eagles fly.”
First of all, who wrote that piece of crap? Second, who decided that singing it after every single touchdown was a great idea? Are there other teams who also take part in this annoying atrocity or is it just the Eagles? Also, why don’t the 49ers have a song because ohmygod, I totally love to sing. (WHAT? I am a woman. And therefore totally allowed to contradict myself. Deal with it.)
Alright. Sunday. 10 a.m. 49ers at Philadelphia. Let’s break it down, yo. (No one talks like that, Daisy. No one.)
- Nothing terrifies me quite as much as the 49ers’ receivers vs. the Eagles’ cornerbacks. I’d like to say I believe that Josh Morgan and Michael Crabtree can handle the Eagle’s Pro Bowl trifecta of Asomugha, Samuel and Rodgers-Cromartie, but remember where I said I don’t get paid to lie? Yeah. Our offense is ranked 32nd. That’s LAST in case you struggle with math.
- Take in that last point and then add in the fact that Crabtree is injured and... ugh.
- Luckily, the Eagles’ run-defense is ranked 30th. Which would be super awesome if Gore weren’t injured and our offensive line didn’t suck. (Sorry, Joe Staley. Until you prove otherwise, I’m going to keep saying it.) Look for Gore to split the carries with rookie Kendall Hunter. (And not that anyone cares, but I am not starting Gore in my fantasy football team on Sunday. Of course, I suck at fantasy football, so if you have him, you should probably use him.)
- Michael Vick is injured, but is listed as probable for the game and is expected to start. The injury is on his non-throwing hand and while it should help us a little bit, I don’t expect it to be a huge game-changer. Our defense looks solid and they’re going to bring the pressure no matter which Eagles’ QB is at the helm. (I am also sitting Vick in my fantasy league this week. Ugh. I should stop being a fantasy football dork. Sorry. Sorry!)
- The 49ers are on the road. Normally, this would mean an almost certain loss. But the fact that the Niners practices this week in Youngstown, Ohio will hopefully help. If we can get this second win on the road, it will be HUGE for us. Huge.
I want the Niners to win more than almost anything (seriously, I’m that pathetic), but this game makes me nervous. I think we have the talent to pull it off, but it’s certainly going to be three hours of non-stop stress.
Speaking of: Where should I watch the game? Kezar Pub is an Eagles’ bar, so it could be interesting to go there Or should I avoid the conflict and go to the Blackthorn Tavern? Or is there somewhere better? Let me know in the comments, pretty please.