• There's a strong chance the federal government could shut down if Congress doesn't work out a budget deal today. Mother Jones explains how condoms are to blame for all this. [MoJo]

• Or, if you want to look at it another way: Republicans just don't want you to get your STDs treated. You should probably stop getting STDs anyway. Gross. [TheAwl]

• Vote on Caltrain service cuts and fare hikes postponed a couple more weeks. [BCN/Appeal]

• Not much more to say: It's the Giants' home opener (finally!) and McCovey Chronicles has a preview for the series against the St. Louis Cardinals. [McCoveyChronicles]

• Chaac Mool, a Yucatecan eatery, is set to move forward in Dolores Park within a month. You'll remember this is the territory where Blue Bottle previously feared to tread, and of course: Chicken John vows to make way too big of a deal about it. [Grubstreet]

• Lady Gaga's next video will tell the pop star's version of the Bible. Gaga plays Mary Magdalene, naturally. With Norman Reedus in a supporting role as Judas. [MTV News]

• Somewhat humorous commercials for sloppy joe mix offends some people. [Advocate]