A daily review of local food-related musings.

Troy Patterson of Slate delivers a stellar (and necessary) thrashing on the "yipping lap dog of baked goods," cupcakes. Suffer, inappropriately frosting-to-cake ratioed sweet treats, suffer.

You know who's writing for Inside Scoop? The handsome yet intimidating Michael Chiarello, that's who. And he's livid. About what, you stutter? About water. And, of course, we wholeheartedly agree with the Top Chef Master; it is a growing problem at Bay Area restaurants. "I’m not fine with the water portion of the bill. I’ve found that a table of four to six people can spend upwards of fifty bucks on water during a meal. One hundred dollars on wines from Italy? No problem — if it’s great wine, I don’t even blink," says Chiarello, zinging our heartstrings. "Fifty dollars on water from Fiji? Stop right there." Yeah, stop it. Anyway, he can tell you more. (Pro tip: Uttering "Hetch-Hetchy" with clenched teeth will put an end to your waiter's endless "still, sparkling, imported" trickery.)

The dark souls sitting on the Board of Supervisors want gay men to get fat. Obviously. So, according to Eater today (via Grub Street), they gently exfoliated the ban on restaurants in the Castro. Cruelty, thy name is digestion.

Bunrab has a slew of images from this past weekend's haughty, tasty SFChefs. Not pictured: the many women in attendance wearing their old prom dresses. Shudder.

Further, SF Weekly's John Birdsall asks of SFChefs, "Where's the glamor?" (Rumor is, it ain't much.) He goes on to describe the opening night party as being "more South Bay than South Beach."