-- Lavay Smith and Her Red Hot Skillet Lickers: Not only does this "Basie-esque" outfit perform lush jazz and blues tunes, but the chanteuse is pretty funny in between songs. Check them out tonight at 7 p.m. at the Top of the Mark, InterContinental Mark Hopkins Hotel, One Nob Hill, (999 California); $10.

-- Joan Rivers Theatre Project: Though you're sure to hear even more about her pendulous, sagging breasts, her new project is also poignantly autobiographical. Aw. Show starts at 8 p.m. at the Magic Theatre, Fort Mason, Bldg. D (at Marina & Buchanan); $25-$40.

-- Gogol Bordello: New York City's LES "Gypsy punk band" (i.e., art rock) performs tonight at 8 p.m. at the Fillmore, 1805 Geary (at Fillmore); $22.50.

-- "The Get Down": This club night in the Lower Haight (ack!) offers indie-rock and punk tunes that you can dance to all night long. How delightful! Music starts at 10 p.m. at Underground SF; 424 Haight; $5

Image: Kathrin Miller