Still, the question being asked is whether or not this is a new thing or are sea lions just not into us. And if it's a new thing, will they have to hire a publicist and go on Letterman to offer an apology? See, lately, there has been an upturn in sea lion attacks off the California coast as this hasn't been the first case. Scientists aren't sure why the recent upsurge in attacks, but they think it has something to do with the sea lion population increasing. This means more interaction between human and sea lion as well as there being more competition over food. Hungry sea lions equal angry sea lions and you wouldn't want to see them when they're angry.

Since nobody is buying our toxic waste theory and having seen Deep Blue Sea a few times, we have another theory to espouse. Mainly that it's all some secret stunt by some hi-tech company to train an army of sea lions to help conquer the world by installing computer chips into the sea lions brains to make them not only smarter and more vicious, but able to think logically. Then, of course, when the word is given, and Samuel L. Jackson is eaten, the sea lions will set forth and attack. And we can only think of one company dastardly and evil enough to think up something like this-- Google.

Oh, you know they would.