Jon was going to write up a blurb about the Giants taking two-out-of-three from the D-Backs, but he was way-laid by a prawn quesidilla at Taco Bell. And yes, you might be thinking to yourself that Taco Bell doesn't serve prawn quesidillas but Jon forgot. He still isn't sure what he ate. Since the Giants' keys to victory were so easy to figure out, in his place and writing up today's Giants blurb will be the President of the United States of America, George W. Bush.

See, what the Giants need to do is to win. You have to win to make it to the playoffs. And the Giants? They won. They beat the Arizona Diamondboys 8-2. They have now won two in a row. That's better than losing two in a row. The Giants are now two-back from the Dodgers and tied for third place.

And see, you need pitching to win and the Giants had pitching. Yesterday, Matt Morris did a heckuva job pitching. He pitched the whole game. That means no relief pitchers were used. He's only won two games since April 13th, but he's been pitching much better lately. And the day before, Matt Cain won a game. Matt Cain is a good man. He's a young man. He's a rookie. He pitches with much fastness. And he's wonfour starts out of the last five starts he's started. That's good.

You also need to hit the ball and score some runs. Scoring more runs than the other team helps you win. That Pedro Feliz guy, he's Mexican by the way and he came here to do a job the Giants couldn't find anybody else to do, got four hits and knocked in six runs. He's a RBI'er, see, and that's what he's got to do-- hit RBIs. He's on pace to hit 112 and he's hitting .280. .280 is a good average.

Now I understand some of you are upset with the Giants this year. I know Jon is (we call him Stalker Guy, by the way, because he won't stop calling Jenna). But you have to have faith in Felipe Alou and Brian Sabean. You have to have strength. You have to stay the course and not flip-flop. Alou and Sabean, they're the Deciders and they decide things. We're just going to have to trust them.

Up next for the Giants, the Seattle Mariners. They hate our freedoms.