Oh, St. Patrick's Day. It's up there with New Year's Eve and Pride in terms of people (who should honestly know better) getting bonkeroo drunk, right?
Sure, you could just stay home — and I'm sure many of you will! Others of you, sensible people, will take public transit, a TNC, or a cab for your green-tinted adventures. Others of you will drive.
Which, no big, if you're not going to drink. But if you do find yourself blotto and with car, remember that AAA will be offering their Tipsy Tow service in honor of the holiday, so your slurred excuse of "well, I can't leave my car heeere" is even more bullshit than usual.
Here's how it works: "Drivers, passengers, party hosts, bartenders, restaurant managers," and any other concerned parties just need to call AAA at (800) 222-4357 to arrange a free, one-way tow of up to 10 miles from 6 p.m. tonight to 10 a.m. Friday.
The driver and any passengers who can safely fit will also get a ride home in the tow truck. And, no, they won't drop you off at another bar — Tipsy Tows are to residences, only.