Sure, San Francisco's Animal Care and Control's director called Tuesday "just another day at the office." But for the rest of us, it was the day a pig unleashed holy hell on the Mission District.
The fearsome Suidae began her reign of terror yesterday morning, SF ACC spokesperson Deb Campbell says. That's when the pig, since christened "Janice" for reasons unknown, was spotted terrorizing those delicate Missionites near 19th and Dolores Streets.
According to Campbell, by the time ACC Sergeant Ellie Sadler (so close!) "arrived at the scene, a crowd of good Samaritans was in the process of rounding up the precocious porker."
However, Janice fought to escape justice, leading Sadler and her volunteer assistants on "a merry chase." That's when Brother Damian of the Society of Saint Francis stepped in. According to the Chron, the "46-year-old Franciscan friar said he was conducting a morning prayer service when a St. Francis deacon ran in and alerted him of the little porker in the street."
What followed was a chase that put the one in Bullitt to shame, as Janice led the holy man on "a three-block up-and-down and up-and-down chase...It was a quick little piglet."
In addition to Brother Damian, Janice's chase team included an unnamed "man in a business suit, who was reportedly "on his cell phone saying, ‘I’m going to be a little late. I’m chasing a pig,’” and a construction worker, who the Chron reports ultimately nabbed the 10-pound beast. But it was the clergyman who got his picture taken with Janice. What a typical Mission Bro, huh?
THE POWER OF PORK COMPELS YOU! THE POWER OF PORK COMPELS YOU! Photo: SF ACC
For now, Campbell says, Janice remains in ACC custody, as "we're here to shelter all types of animals - piglets included," ACC executive director Virginia Donohue says. Her guardian has five days to claim her, Campbell says, "and if no one comes forward, Janice will most likely be offered to a rescue group that specializes in all things pig."
Unless, of course, Janice breaks free again. Stranger things have happened!
"You win this time, Sadler," Janice muttered. "BUT NO BARS CAN HOLD ME!"