We're at the one-yard line of completely eff-ing up the Super Bowl, becoming the worst and least grateful host city in 50 years, and frankly everybody seems pretty excited about it. With the clock ticking toward Sunday, what should be the final play?
While Daisy thinks you should try to enjoy yourselves, the Chronicle is rehashing a surefire way to poison your Super Bowl party guests and play the evil host yourself. Just try this bizarre guac (feat. mustard and Worcestershire sauce).
In reprising the recipe, which ran in 1948, the Chron also gloats that they were way ahead of the New York Times' recent guac debacle. There, as you may recall, the cooking section's recipe for guac with the simple addition of english green peas was the laughing stock of Twitter and Facebook dot coms.
Well, if you thought that was worth getting upset about (very many did), then get a load of this.
'Guacamole:' An Appetizer With a Mexican Accent
Appetizers are a gracious beginning to a meal. There are many kinds and types but the Mexicans really have something good in "guacamole," pronounced hwa-ca-mo-lay."
This is how it's mixed: Sieve avocado pulp [ed note: WTF is avocado pulp and why would you sieve it??] to make 1 cup and beat until fluffy. Add 1/2 cup peeled, mashed, fresh tomatoes, juice of 1/2 lemon, a dash of Worcestershire sauce, 1/4 teaspoon of dry mustard, a drop or two of tabasco, 2 tablespoons minced onion and salt to taste.
Okay, okay the mustard won't completely ruin your guac. It might be fine. You'll hardly taste it once you put it on a tortilla chip. Right?
Oh. Oh no.
"This is a delicious spread for potato chips, toast or crackers, and may also be used as a salad dressing for grapefruit or tomatoes."
I wouldn't serve this guacamole, in this way, to my enemies.
Could someone at least get me a Miller Lite to wash this taste out of my mouth?