The Chronicle sounds ready to put Dolores Park on double secret probation, so maybe we'd better not tell them that — as Uptown Almanac reports — Saturday brought more bad behavior from park patrons. Specifically, a fight broke out over free samples of Kettle brand chips being distributed in the open section of the under-construction park.

Apparently, employees distributing the samples were canvassing the park when two would-be samplers came to blows and were arrested.


According to an eyewitness, one guy ran over, and under the influence of extreme hunger, excitedly grabbed a free sample from a larger bundle of chips held by an employee. As he quickly pulled away his prize and made moves to hold it on high for all to see, he accidentally hit another gentlemen in the face.

The second gentlemen, who was in the process of diving for chips himself, did not take kindly to being struck and demanded an apology. When the apology was less than forthcoming, hunger turned to rage and a shoving match/chase/fight ensued to the delight and cheers of the more relaxed park goers.

After several instances of recent Stanley Roberts-worthy antics — from construction cart-jacking to possibly lice-infested guinea pig abandoning to sandbox bottle-breaking, the Chronicle has been hot on the Dolores Park beat. Columnists Matier and Ross broke down the park's litter problem by the numbers, which we discussed last week, and before that, C.W. Nevius gave his two cents twice on the need for further park policing.

This weekend, urban design critic John King also weighed in, bravely imbedding with park gardener "heroes" whom neither he nor I envy and to whom everyone owes it to pick up after themselves.

What he found was indeed a sad state of affairs, one where real needs in the park are neglected because trash duties take priority. "We’d rather have them pruning, planting, all the other things that they would rather be doing as well,” Michelle Pallavicini, acting park services supervisor for all 13 facilities in the neighborhood, told King, but emphasizing that “debris removal as needed” comes first. King and the crew in particular mock the Delfina pizza boxes, IPA bottles, and even the Veuve Cliquot bottle they find. Shouldn't the Deflina crowd, accustomed to an upscale restaurant, know better, he seems to hint? Well, anyway, it sounds like King at least missed the Kettle chips brawl. All the better for it, and if you can't bring a bag to the park without fighting over it or leaving it on the ground, better stay home.

Previously: Dolores Park's Massive Trash Problem, By The Numbers
All SFist coverage of Dolores Park.