• The San Francisco Fire Department needs $28.1 million to upgrade their fire fighting fleet. [SFEx]
  
• A "bus-riding techie" willingly allowed himself to be roasted by a group of local comedians over the weekend. Hilarity ensued, but Google did not approve.
  
• Here is a New York Times article about how Larry Ellision just does not give any fucks. [NYT]
  
• Partying with UC Berkeley's notoriously druggy co-op during the last days of Cloyne Court. [SF Mag]
  
• At one point, the Golden Gate Bridge could have been this absolutely nuts submerged "boat tunnel." Thankfully, we don't live in that alternate reality. [Atlantic Cities]
  
• Fancy Boba Tea coming to Union Square, just as long as their kickstarter gets off the ground. [EaterSF]
  
• On Divisadero, pitcher-margarita emporium Tortilla Heights is closing after a decade of tequila shilling. [InsideScoop]
  
• Here are some so-called "important" movies and the justification for never actually seeing them. [Slow News Day]