Longtime nudism activist Gypsy Taub, 44, married fiancé Jaymz Smith, 20, yesterday as planned on the steps of City Hall. At least, they were on the steps until they stripped naked for their vows, at which point they were escorted off the steps by police and ticketed. Still, they exchanged vows and danced a little to the mariachi band they brought before they put their clothes back on, and under city law none of those ladies present with their tops off were required to put them back on.
Lucky for everyone it's been a mild week, weather-wise. And according to the Chron's Sam Whiting, Taub had trouble getting the other nude activists in attendance to join in the dancing. "Being naked is one thing. Dancing naked is something else." The cops basically let everything go down without incident, and just ticketed Taub and Smith and handed them blankets after the fun was over. Taub had lobbied to get Mayor Ed Lee to have the second dance with her, but, alas, he was otherwise detained.
A few details we enjoy: Presiding officiant George Davis, best known as our frequent nudist candidate for mayor, used a book titled Erotic Art as his "holy book" throughout the ceremony; Stanley Roberts was notably and not surprisingly offended by the whole thing, but he sounds most annoyed about the fact that women's breasts were bared perfectly legally throughout; there was a matinee of The Nutcracker about to start at the Opera House nearby, leading to many awkward moments with outer Bay Area mothers and their well dressed children streaming past; Davis finished the ceremony with the words, "Kiss, and conjugate."; Jaymz actually couldn't wait and kissed Taub several times before the vow even began.
The groom, Jaymz Smith, 20, appeared in a thrift store tuxedo to offset the white worn by Taub, 44.
"Oh, my God, dude," he said upon first sight of the bride in white. "She looks gorgeous."
It was the first time Smith had ever worn a tux, and he couldn't figure out how to behave in it. So he kissed the bride before the vows, a faux pas if there ever was one.
Somebody snapped a picture so he kissed her again, and kept doing it until Taub broke free to yell, "Has anybody seen a mariachi band?" Sure enough somebody had, waiting on the wrong side of City Hall. It took another 10 minutes for them to gather up their instruments and walk all the way around the building.
Ladies and gentlemen, no matter what your feelings about the older exhibitionists who were the primary poster children for the nudity ban up in the Castro, please don't deny that it's stories like this one, and people like Gypsy Taub, who make San Francisco great.