It's as though the gods want you to suffer this Thanksgiving, to just put the fucking turkey in the oven and hunker down with your Pinot and whiskey and give thanks that at least you aren't stuck in an airport somewhere. At least the election's over, and at least you don't have to deal with your annoying aunt/brother this year. At least because of the rain that's on its way you won't be staring longingly out the window during the interminable feast wishing you were galloping down the street or sitting on a patio. You can go in the other room and play with your phone. You can go home after, half-drunk and calorie-saturated, and watch another episode of American Horror Story and call it a night. It'll be sunny by Friday, and even kind of warm on Saturday, so as long as you aren't following the sheep to Macy's and Target, you still have a shot at a pleasant afternoon.