Rainbow Groceries, the preferred supermarket for white progressives and artisan ilk, gets the piss taken out of it via SF Weekly's Michael Leaverton. It is, without exaggeration, one of the best things we've read all year. It transcends the average anti-hippie rant into something sublime. Behold:

At first Rainbow seems like the plant-based solution to all your chemical based-fears -- it's like one big antioxidant. Children who walk morosely through Rainbow have lower levels of ADHD than those brats huffing broccoli soup fumes at the Potrero Safeway. Take a deep breath and absorb the floating free radicals, because they are free. Now go to the olive bar and collect samples, because they are also free. Step cautiously to price tags. They appear mismarked, correct? Is the soap $7.99? Of course it is, because of some crap in the soap. This is what they are charging for these things. Rainblow Your Paycheck, anyone? Don't say this near worker-owners whatever you do.

Also noteworthy:

-If you need to buy a vitamin, God help you. We once lost a child in there.

-Hey, wow, bulk water.

-You might not recognize these breakfast cereals.

Read the entire thing immediately.