SF Chronicle's Jon Bonné released the Top 100 Wines list for 2009. This year's angle was that more wines under $30 made the list. Which, of course, is fantastic news here at SFist HQ, where the wine flows freely.

But Bonné saves his ire and frustration for this year's too buttery, too sweet Chardonnays.

Chardonnay's identity crisis continues. The final handful reflects some very successful efforts, and at the very top, Chardonnay can be extraordinary. But its middle ground was dispiriting, a barrage of excessive oak, alcohol and sugar. Flavors and styles were so inconsistent that at times I wondered whether the wines actually came from the same grape.

However, Bonné fails to mention that, for lack of a better term, whores drink Chardonnay. Look no further than an episode of For the Love of Ray J (where one of the comparatively elegant contestants was rechristened after the butter wine), any other amazing VH1 dating show, or MTV's Jersey Shore (the Mad Men of the tool-whore reality show genre, if you will) to see that self-described "classy" women prefer to sip Chardonnay before offering their vaginas to violent men with chinstraps. For some, the sweet tang of Chardonnay will always hit the spot. So, kudos to those of you who manage to drink oaked Chardonnays. (We don't know how you do it, but you're wildly entertaining at it.)

Anyway, Bonné goes on to praise Rhone-style reds, which he deems "fantastic," and said Cabernets were, appropriately enough, "delivered with a bit more restraint this year." Read the list in its entirety at SF Chronicle.