Hey kids! Tomorrow is Election Day across this great land of ours and you know what good citizens do on Election Day? They vote, that's what! Here is a quick run down of what we have to look forward to dealing with here in San Francisco as we engage in that great experiment this writer loves to call la democracia:
Proposition A - Budget Process or I Ain't No Accountant, Mang! Why Am I Even Voting On This?! Amends the City Charter to establish a new budgeting process including requiring a two year rolling budget cycle, setting up a five-year budget plan, and Zzzzzzzzzzzz! Boring! Next!
Proposition B - Aides to the Supervisors or You Do This! You Do That! Amends the City Charter which currently limits each supervisor to only two aides and allows them to decide all on their own whether they want to hire more and better aides than ever before! This one reminds this writer of the time his sister decided she wanted 25 bridesmaids, even though she only had 150 guests, and Emily Post said, um, no, you can only have like three bridesmaids, and his sister said Emily Post could go stuff it, or similar. Um.
Proposition C - Renaming Candlestick Park or Don't Leave Us 49ers! Please?! Here! Have Some American Dollars! Allows Rec and Parks to enter into a contract with the 49ers to sell off the name to Candlestick Park to the highest corporate bidder. The City and the 49ers will then split the profits. Half the City's share will go to fund the salaries of directors at rec centers for the impoverished masses, the rest to maintaining the windswept outpost we will always call Candlestick, no matter what. The 49ers can do what ever they want with their share. Maybe they'll use it to hire U-Haul trucks for their move to Santa Clara. Or maybe 49ers kingpin Jed York will use it take this writer out on a glamorous date at French Laundry! Hey! One can dream! This is America!