FOOD/DRINK/DYKE: Be sure to check out Orson's first-ever Ladies Night. Hosted by the formidable Betty Sullivan (of Betty's List), tonight's kick off party, according to Tablehopper, boasts no cover charge, $5 cocktail specials, menu specials from 5pm - 7pm in the bar and in the lounge, Elizabeth Falkner milling about, additional specials at 7pm, with dinner served until 10pm. Oh, and lots of ladies who love ladies. And we're not talking your garden variety Lexington Club dykes. We're talking L Word-ish power lesbians. Only more dramatic. So, ladies, pull off that Snugglie, give the cat an extra cup of dry food, warm up the Toyota, and head down to SoMa for tonight's official grand party. DJ Stefanie Phillips mans the decks, so to speak. (Happens every Thursday. Check out their Facebook page, why don't ya.)

5pm - closing // Orson (508 Fourth) // free

MUSIC: SFBG says of Bare Wires, "The power trio is rapidly perfecting its crisp, no-bull garage punk reminiscent of the Stooges on too much caffeine and other stimulants." Static Static and Fun Blood open.

9 p.m. // Hemlock Tavern (1131 Polk) // $5

BEER: Check out the final night of The Act of Drinking Beer with Friends Is the Highest Form of Art. What's this, you ask? Well, it's space where you can "drink beer, meet people, and hang out with friends ... hosted by Tom Marioni, a pioneering Bay Area conceptual artist who has been regularly staging free beer salons as social artworks at his studio, in museums, and in alternative spaces since 1970." Also, there will be free beer. Bottoms up.

5pm - 7pm // SF MOMA (151 Third Street) // free