CLUB/THEATER: San Francisco's most mentally unstable and drug-addled tranny show, "Charlie Horse," always puts on a most festive show every Friday nights. But tonight it gets better as they salute clinical obesity with "Trans Fat." Former Miss Trannyshack Anna Conda hosts phat (har har!) performances by Holy McGrail, Lady Bear, Monistat, Daffney Deluxe, Hoku Mama, Jupiter, Joi deVivre, and No See Um. (No See Um, by the way, is doing attribute to Jenny Craig, so she asks you to show up with food to throw at her while she performs. We plan on chucking a sleeve of Pringles at her. How about you?)

9 p.m. (show starts at midnight) // The Cinch (1723 Polk) // fee

FILM: Since it's Friday, 6.13.08, it's only fitting that we should mention the original, the best, the pre-Jason Voorhees cinema classic, (1980), screens tonight and tomorrow night over in Pac Heights. Watch as the brilliant Betsy Palmer hacks away at Camp Crystal Lake's bevy of cream-pie sluts. Not to be missed. (Cheryl Eddy brings up something we've also always felt: that her fisherman's sweater is far more terrifying that Jason's hockey mask. It's just... so creepy.)

11:55 p.m.// Clay (2261 Fillmore) // $8.50

OPEN BAR/HAPPY HOUR: Hey, you! Over there, the drunk getting the shakes at your keyboard. Stave off AA tonight and head over to 111 Minna for DL-laced happy hour "Look Out Weekend," featuring a hosted bar (for one hour, 4 - 5:30 p.m., hosted by Peroni and Fernet) and free appetizer from one of our favorite food joints, Bar Crudo, from 4 - 7 p.m.

4 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. // 111 Minna Gallery //$3-5

Friday the 13th