The greatest problem posed to the able-bodied by our current state of on-demand instant gratification, posits this video from Funny or Die, is that it's just so godamn much work, like, answering the door or, really, doing anything!

Sure, you have the physical strength and dexterity to do things for yourself, but why should you perform these demeaning tasks when an underpaid, benefitsless contractor can do it for you? Instead, use fictional app Door Drop to summon "someone under 25 who doesn't understand that we're not paying them well" to come over and bring your Instacart in, feed it to you, then carry you to the can. Life, disrupted!

If this app were real, I'd predict billions in VC before a spectacular flame-out in Q3. Since this app isn't real, I'm assembling a team to create it (all of whom will be paid in options, natch). See ya, suckers!

Update: Commenter todlo asks that we add an NSFW tag to this post, so I am...but only because he requested it! It's pretty tame in my opinion, and I don't want you guys to think I NSFWed it to clickbait you.