San Francisco City Attorney Dennis Herrera and 19 other state attorneys general announced Tuesday that the makers of Four Loko — a sugary, formerly hyper-caffeinated, alcoholic beverage — have agreed to stop marketing their products to underage kids and other amateur drinkers. Part of the deal will require beverage maker Phusion Projects to delete the juvenile posts that show up on Four Loko's social media pages.

In one of the more humorous press releases in recent memory, City Attorney Herrera's office cited some charming updates to Four Loko's web branding efforts:

One innovative clause in the agreement obliges Phusion to monitor its social media pages to crack down on and delete posts showing irresponsible behavior. Prior entries from users on Four Loko social media sites include “My baby boy is a result of my drunken Four binge of wonder,” and, in response to the question “What Loko Starts the Perfect Saturday Night?” the answer “The one in the 17 year olds hands [sic].”

In addition to the social media crackdown, Four Loko and Phusion have agree to stop promoting the drinks on college campuses, to stop depicting underage drinkers in their materials, to stop promoting "rapid or excessive consumption" of the sugary disaster beverage and, finally, to stop putting Santa Claus in their advertisements.

For his part, Phusion CEO protested while also announcing the settlement: "Underage drinking and alcohol abuse are serious problems in need of serious solutions,” Sloan explained. “They will not, however, be solved by singling out specific products or alcoholic beverage categories.”

[SFist Tipline]
[BCN/Appeal]