Last week Willie Brown was, for perhaps the first time in his life, not the biggest ego in the room when he made an appearance at Sean Parker's opulent startup party. It's hard to imagine what sort of business Willie had at a party full of young whippersnappers like those crazy startup kids, but we heard Brown pal Stanlee Gatti designed the room and McCalls - who are responsible for supplying roughly 95% of the former Mayor's meals - handled the catering. So he was probably snuck in through the kitchen under a food cart. (With a white tablecloth of course.)

For those of us who don't have the opportunity to attend such lavish shindigs, Willie helpfully posted a list of his favorite tables at his favorite restaurants around town. All the usual suspects are here for your Willie-sighting pleasure: At North Beach Restaurant one should always sit at the 6-tops so you can fit in all your cronies. At Le Central you should just wait until Wilkes Bashford leaves and then sit where he was sitting. Baker and Banker has "probably the most perfect table in the City", but most importantly - you should definitely go to Bobo's on Lombard and watch the "live porno performances in the motel across the street."

Finally, Willie Brown and noted District 6 Supervisor Jane Kim are teaming up to throw a fundraising dinner for Ed Lee. Except they apparently didn't want to be seen together and won't be able to fit everyone in to one of those clandestine booths at Sam's Grill that Willie likes so much, so they're heading down the peninsula to hold their fundraiser at The Kitchen in Millbrae. Why would Willie ever go farther South than SFO, you wonder? Unclear really — the Guardian, hard-nosed reporters that they are, couldn't get a straight answer out of anyone involved. Which is odd, considering the $5,000-per-head event's stated purpose: to honor "Mayor Willie Brown and Supervisor Jane Kim for their dedication to advancing accountability in government."

Movie Time! Willie recommends you go see Drive, "one of the most violent movies of the year."

[Willie's World]