CLUB: There's no one sexier or more alluring that bar workers. Barbacks and bartenders are typically hired for their good looks and friendly Cheers-like dispositions, and El Rio celebrates them at the Fourth Annual Bar Workers Ball. All bartenders, mixologists, doorstaff, coatchecks, peaches puffs, go-go dancers, street walkers, and other nightlife employees are welcome. (We daytime worker bees thank you all. Seriously.) Oh, and there will be some sort of contest where Broke Ass Stuart will judge whatever it is that involves his mad judging skillz. This could be the party of the year. So far. (For SI workers only.)

9 p.m. // El Rio (3158 Mission) // free

ART: Punk icon Winston Smith has an opening reception tonight called "Fed Up." With what, exactly? You'll have to find out for yourself. But one thing is for certain: art reception = free booze.

7 p.m. - 10 p.m. // FivePoints ArtHouse (50 Bannam Place) // free