On "America's Got Talent," Oakland schoolteacher Michael Strelo-Smith (check out his Web site and tell us just what the hell that thing in the upper left hand corner is) had a cold during his second performance, but sang anyway. Whether it was the cold, or his rather boring presentation, we can't say, but the judges deemed it not good enough, and he didn't make it to the Top 20. But Kashif and Boy Shakira did. Obviously.
We talked about our disappointment with Oakland filmmaker Mateen Kemet's short film "Profile" last week, but enough viewers disagreed with us, and he remains "On the Lot."
"You Think You Can Dance," placed Shauna into the bottom three teams; she danced for her life to the strains of "Zombie" by the Cranberries, and...was eliminated! Cut! Done off! Zombified! We aren't terribly broken up about it, but we did kind of get a kick out of seeing her rather diminutive self standing next to the Amazonian Cat every week.
Previously on "Pirate Master," Nessa avoided the dreaded Raft of Shame and remained a pirate. This week her team lost the treasure hunt, which meant Captain Fake Accent would remain in power for another week, and Nessa was in danger of a vote out. In other news, we can not believe how many people there still are on that bloody ship. This show is going to take FOREVER to end.
Nessa was marked with a black spot, as was Joe Don, her main squeeze, and the popular Louie. Joe Don was in possession of the royal pardon, and had to sell it to the highest bidder, who was Nessa--again. And once again, she didn't actually need it. Joe Don was sent a-driftin' but not before giving Nessa a big, sloppy kiss good-bye.