SFist Rants: Body Dysmorphia and Goofy-Looking Genitals

And that's why it is so completely aggravating to take a trip to the northern bulge of Baker Beach -- you know, the part with the naked people -- even though, on this past Memorial Day, only about a quarter of BB's sunbathers were nude. You see, many of the naked bodies that decorate Baker Beach are ... how to put this nicely ... misshapen assemblages of discolored flesh. And yet there they were, lounging and strutting around with nary a care in the world. Now, we have no urge to join the ranks of the publicly nude, of course -- we're not weirdos! -- but for Pete's sake, they're freaking NAKED and LOVING IT; meanwhile we can barely muster up the courage to expose our ankles. What the hell is our problem? Can we please, just for once, just get OVER ourselves? Curse you, Baker Beach, for making us feel ugly AND crazy.