SFist is the first to admit that we've had a hand in a lot of crappy press releases, but there's something about Godiva's ‘Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner’ Celebrity Charity Auction that really sticks in our craw. Maybe we're the only ones who are annoyed by this - our esteemed sister Gothamist reported on this event last week with no visible vitrol. Here's the deal: Godiva's auctioning off dinners themed to match the flavors in their "limited edition" truffles (people, it's candy they sell in a mall. How "limited" and "edition" can it be?) on eBay. But these aren't just any candy-themed dinners (wasn't that an episode of Iron Chef?), these are dinners prepared by noted chefs and shared with you, seven of your pals, and a celebrity!

The eBay auction is actually a fascinating look at the current market value of certain celebrities. At this writing, New York's dinner prepared by Mario Batali and attended by Sarah Jessica Parker is kicking everyone's ass, including (#2)Ben Affleck/Todd English in Boston, (#3) Ricky Martin/Allen Susser in Miami, (#4) Leonardo DiCaprio/Govind Armstrong in LA, and our own sad, sad #5 - Benjamin Bratt and Talisa Soto, with dinner prepared by Gary Danko.

Well, we can't say we're surprised by the 5th place finish of the team of Bratt and Soto. We're assuming that the motive for bidding on this dinner is not so much to support the very worthy charities all these celebrities have chosen to support, as much as it is to rub elbows with the rich and famous.

And while we can't imagining having to spend an evening with any of these celebrities (whom we are sure are fine and decent people all, but wouldn't it be hard to relax, pig out on fine food, and get smashed with SJP?), we feel especially panicky at the thought of having to make small talk with Benjamin "I used to date Julia" Bratt and Talisa "I was in Mortal Combat not just One but Two, yes, that's right, Two, the one even Christopher Lambert wouldn't be in" Soto.