This year's Stanford commencement speaker? Oprah Winfrey. [SJ Merc]The Spots goes eHarmony-ish on us. [Spots]Milk screenplay writer Dustin Lance Black looks ten-years-old. We mean that as a compliment. [BAR]A street lamp dies, another night is over, the big cat exhibit reopens... [SFGate]With the return of Tyra's mildly-retarded ass comes Potes totally brilliant ANTM recaps. [TWOP]Meow: Harvey Milk Club prez Rafael Mandelman goes after Leno, Newsom. [BeyondChron]......

-- Perverts. [ASD] -- San Francisco to go solar. [Curbed] -- SUV rampage remembered. [SFGate] -- Bernal Heights robbers? Oh noes! [The Snitch] -- The McKesson Corporation sued. Also, SFBG's got the love for the Examiner? [SFBG] -- The handitards over at Best Buy apologize for sending Scott Beale an inane cease & desist missive. Classic stuff, folks. [Laughing Squid] -- Blueprint -- it's not a good thing. (Eh.) [ValleyWag]......

-- Aimee Mann's Second Annual Christmas Show: Paul F. Tompkins, Sean Hayes, Chuck Prophet, and Morgan Murphy join the delightfully blond songstress for a night of holiday warm fuzzies. Because X-Mas is coming and there's no way around it, come catch this wonderful singer/songwriter during the, um, recording-a-holiday-album period of her career. Show starts at 8 p.m. at Bimbo's 365; $35.50. -- Margot at the Wedding: Fantastic movie. Just great. And whatever. It totally......

-- Aaah! Rosebud: This re-telling of Citizen Kane involves a "an evil sled, competitive curlers, an aspiring diva, and soul-devouring zombies." See, if Wells had jus incorporated those things into Kane, he might have won the Best Picture Oscar. The curtain goes up at 8 p.m. at New Langton Arts, 1246 Folsom (at Eighth Street); $20-$25. -- Squaretape, Little Yellow Perfect, and Downtown Harvest: Local synth-rock band, Little Yellow Perfect; Squaretape, whose latest album......

-- Writers With Drinks: Tonight Robert Mailer Anderson, writer and game designer Austin Grossman, Sheng Wang, Darieck Scott, and Dom Brassey read. 7 p.m. at the Make-Out Room, 3225 - 22nd; $3-$5. -- Deep Fried Murder: A play about the world of competitive eating, veganism, and breaking up. Curtain rises at 8 p.m. at the Climate Theatre, 285 - 9th Street; $12. -- Altered Barbie Show: Fifth annual doll/art show has over 75 designers......

-- Marga Gomez: Multiaward-wining lesbian/Latina comic makes her Plush Room debut with Joshua Raoul Broday on the ivories, and former Mornings on 2 personality and comedian, Mark Pitta. Show starts at 8 p.m., the Empire Plush Room, 940 Sutter; $20. -- Hard Eight (aka Sydney): Before making Magnolia, the sprawling masterpiece about fate and The Valley, Paul Thomas Anderson made his debut with Hard Eight. The visibly-boney Gwyneth Paltrow plays a cocktail waitress/whore in......

-- Double Indemnity (1944) and Clash by Night (1952): Barbara Stanwyck sears the screen tonight in two gems: Billy Wilder's shadow-heavy, film noir hit about adultery and murder, followed by Fritz Lang's fick featuring Marilyn Monroe in one of her first roles. Shows start at 7 p.m. and 9:15 p.m., respectively, at the Castro Theatre, Castro & Market Streets. -- Brass Mafia: Along with DJ Daymitreeus spinning in between sets, local jazz band performs......

When compiling my "Year in Review" in my head, I thought, "Hey, I do get out of the house sometimes!" This year was a year of firsts for me. I saw some awe-inspiring bands, took some fun Bay Area trips, and became a regular at some tasty restaurants....

Since I can't remember half the stuff I spewed out this year (I barely know what I'm writing half the time anyways), here, instead, is a few of my favorite things. Best TV Show (drama)- "Battlestar Galactica" Why I like this show is because it thinks big-- big themes, big action, big drama, big story, big music, big everything. At times (like the episode where they finally get off New Caprica) the show feels almost movie big. But the best part of it is that it's also small in it's way. Shows like "24" or "Lost" might have interesting characters, but for the most part, the characters react to the action. That's not necessarily true on "BSG" because often the action comes because of the characters. For instance, the driving force in the Cylon's occupying New Caprica was partly because a few characters discovered what love means. Which yes, sounds kind of lame until you consider that the whole occupying thing was kind of nasty and that one character plotted the destruction of mankind, another shot Capt. Adama, and the third blew herself and her ship up with a nuclear warhead. Awesome. ...

This morning we were lying in bed, trying to summon the will face the day as the Alice Morning Show played in the background. (In the words of SFist Jon: "Hey, they're funnier than the Live105 crew and there's only so much public radio one can take in the morning.") It's so weird, but we could have sworn we heard the CSI half of the late, great CSI: Plumpjack in an interview discussing Gavin......

Outbound -- next train, N Wednesday, now approaching. Tonight: The San Francisco Public Library has invited Caldecott-winning book illustrator Tomie DePaola for the 10th annual Effie Lee Morris Lecture. Effie Lee Morris was the coordinator of children's literature at the SFPL from 1963-77 and was a pioneer in spearheading the development of children's library resources. The lecture is free and starts at 6:30 p.m. in the Koret Auditorium of the Main Library. Thursday: Come see......

Saturday: we're hitting the YBCA (700 Howard Street at Third) for the SFist Krissy-recommended Kronos Quartet and experimental musicians, Matmos and Walter Kitundu collaboration. Sure, we love the Kronos Quartet and Matmos, but we're also eager to see the extraordinarily threatening Kitundu in action. Shows are Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m., buy tickets here. Sunday: we can't miss Maker Faire, the DIY get-together to beat all get-togethers, at the San Mateo Fairgrounds. There are......

Saturday: Box magazine is having their Issue 3 (Fetish) launch party from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. at Oakland's Golden Bull (412 14th Street). They're promising us DJs, drink specials, giveaways, and more. Sunday: We're hitting Project Artaud Theatre 450 Florida St at 17th) for AcroSports City Circus's new acrobatic spectacle, the Metropolis-inspired 2106 Shows are Fridays at 7p.m., Saturdays and Sundays at 2 p.m. until April 30. Monday: We're plumb out. What are......

Saturday: SFist Jackson just about lost his s**t when he heard about MOB: the ArtFag Mafia Premiere Event. Starting at around 9 p.m., there'll be "Fighting Robots, Fire Art, DJs and bands". It's all happening at the NIMBY warehouse (28th St. and Mandela Parkway, in West Oakland). Sunday: We've got to go see sketch comedians Bitter Show's Pilot Pitch-O-Rama, in which they pitch "terrific television pilots to you. All you have to do is......

There was a great disturbance in the internets this week as the Grateful Dead harshed Dead Heads' mellow by trying to close down the main site Dead Heads (and others) use to download taped performances. By amazing coincidence, it was also around the same time the Dead launched a pay service on their own Web site. But after the decision drew major flack and pissed off thousands of Dead Heads (we haven't seen them this mad since the Dead played an entire three show set at Shoreline without playing one "Scarlet/Fire"), the Dead changed their minds and announced that they'll be okay with people downloading concerts taped by fans. Shows taped by the Dead themselves (Soundboard recordings), however, can now only be had on the Dead's site. ...

Those ubiquitous festive red cups from Starbucks say "It only happens once a year," but apparently it lasts for a good six weeks. We're kicking off party season by celebrating Mesh Magazine's two-year anniversary on Friday at 111 Minna. For a mere $8 cover you can see The Mall, Moggs, Calling All Monsters, DJ Nako (Popscene), and DJ Rooster (Ugly Sundays) while drinking some Fernet-Branca and congratulating the editors and writers on two great years.......

Tonight and tomorrow at the Purple Onion, catch fifteen rising stars on the SF comedy scene for only $15! That's only $1 a comedian, or about a nickel a joke! Seriously, catch them know before they get a show on Comedy Central, sign a multi-million dollar deal, and then disappear to South Africa to center themselves spiritually. Shows start at eight. Hoarding your serotonin agonists/antagonists for Burning Man, but have an itch to see......

Our concert picks for the week of 6/30 - 7/6. "Hey baby, it's the 4th of July!" What artist's "4th of July" song sticks in your head this time of year? Whether it's X, Soundgarden, Bruce, or some band we've never heard of, hum along while we tell you about this weeks' concert picks. Tonight check out the California Homegrown Music Series at Mezzanine featuring headliners Communique, brought to you for free by the Guardian.......

Let us begin this week by making a heartfelt plea to the TV Powers-That-Be: Film more shows in San Francisco! We can't really explain why we get such a thrill out of seeing our beautiful town show up on prime time television, but we do. Maybe we're hoping to see someone we know wandering around in the background. Maybe we're just hoping to see ourselves wandering around in the background. Or maybe we just......

A review by special show correspondent Ginevra. If you'd been listening on Friday night, you'd have heard the sounds of two drum kits, funky bass, plenty of moogs and DJ's to scramble the sound, and one helluva show. Amon Tobin, Roots of Orchis, Tussle, and TelephoneJimJesus played at Bimbo's 365 for the Noise Pop festival. In the thick of Amon Tobin's set, in the middle towards the back of the crowd, it sounded like everything......

In this week's stage roundup, we'll take "Improvised Game Shows" for $200, Alex....