Sure Jager makes things all surreal, tequila makes you do things you normally wouldn't do, and whiskey makes things all sh---kicking but if you really want something that brings the crazy, there's absinthe. Absinthe was a drink popular at the turn of the last century but was banned supposedly for "making people insane" and by insane we mean too fin de siècle, you know-- into impressionism, dressing colorfully, chopping of one of their ears, and being gay. But now it's making a comeback, thanks to a heroic lawyer who got the prohibition in the U.S. revoked and thanks to that lawyer, a distillery in Alameda is going to start making some. Hell, if people thought they needed it to make it through the turn of the last century how do they expect us to make it through this turn of the century?

If you wanted to get it before, you had to order online from a web site in Europe, something which a "friend" did. The only problem was that it was illegal here so there was the occasional issue of possibly being busted by the feds.

For those wondering what the big deal is, absinthe is 120 proof, which is about 50 percent higher than vodka and whiskey. Our "friend" who ordered it claims that it's like being stoned and drunk at the same time and who doesn't like that? First you get a drunken buzz and then you discuss the meaning of life and the awesomeness of Floyd until speaking becomes impossible. Again, who doesn't like that? The only hitch is that it's not very tasty-- like ouzo, only more so-- and in order to do it up right, you'll need to add some water and some sugar. Again, all this according to this "friend."

We, of course, believe only in clean living.